Poof

There’s the mushroom theory. that Santa brought amanita muscaria mushrooms as gifts to families which are poisonous but poisonous like alcohol is poisonous. They get you fucked up. Not like trippy psilocybin mushrooms but u get real loosey goosey and energetic. Reindeer are known to eat them and jump up into the air. They’re red mushrooms w/white spots, like the Mario mushrooms. Supposedly Santa gets the colors of his outfit from the mushroom.

I take it back bf got me a double quarter pounder from WackArnold’s

Nothing yet supposedly a gift is on the way but I won’t hold my breath

Does being called daddy bother u during sex?

My DM says they can’t regurgitate and it’s a really important game mechanic for a quest.

Oh Daddy fuck me

Those usually have skeletons in them

They’ll protect your scalp from harmful uv rays

That’s what dad’s do

Jesus is dead

I only got one gift too

I never know who the fuck anybody is either

I don’t get anything done until the night before. But my Christmas With The Cranks / Hellraiser crossover is coming along quite well.

Good

Was there a reason u signed up on Christmas Eve?

Hey Cau Jesus and Christ called they said they hatechu

Horniness isn’t a single quantifiable thing. Hormones are complicated.

There’s an opioid epidemic bc white ppl are comfortable w/hard drugs when it comes from a doctor bc white ppl.

Horniness isn’t a single quantifiable thing. Hormones are complicated. I think I have some insights into it bc my hormones have gone back and forth a lot over the past 4 years bc of everyone in the industry pressuring me not to take them so that I can “perform” better.

I was taking a bath. I closed my eyes and slumped down flat on my back in the water. I opened my eyes and there was a huge centipede on the ceiling right above me. Almost as soon as I noticed it, it detached and fell into the tub with me. Obviously I freaked and got out as fast as possible. It must’ve died on impact or drowned like instantly which was weird. I thought it would’ve survived. Or maybe it had a heart attack while it was up there, and that’s the reason it fell in the first place. Anyway, always watch out for centipedes suiciding into your bath.

No you’re not

Weed or extra strippers

Different reasons for different ppl