Mix

@Rogue߷Alphonse

I think I have a hot water leak. There was a water leak in my bathroom, coming form the baseboard, not the toilet. Also, my laundry room floor is very warm. I turned off the hot water valve on the water heater to stop the leak. Is this right? Internets said so... Plumber's coming tomorrow

"Damn it, Dom, she locked it in her desk drawer. We'll never get it now." "I got an idea. Tie this tow cable to her drawer."

y'know what, I thought something was missing...poor guy just forgot the fire...

really, cause you said that you almost passed out...I've broken bones and never even came close to passing out...this seems serious and not something you should tough your way through

days! No, that seems much...I was talking minutes...I could never take that pain for several days I'd schedule the doctor's appointment now if you've been feeling it all day

So it's a very sharp stabby pain when you inhale? Had that and was worried, but it went away and I did nothing...

Another year, another pumpkin spice thread....at this point you have to imagine that people are more sick of the jokes than the actual pumpkin spice...

I'm still waiting for you to text back.....r u down to go skydiving at that place with one star on yelp? Like I said in the text, I think it makes it more of an adrenaline rush...

Come back Poof....I read that thread or parts of it and it wasn't that bad.....ok, I didn't read it.....it was really long and I didn't want to.... but you know what, whoever says they haven't wished death on someone's kids in a fit of anger is lying.......everybody's doin' it In conclusion.....fuck these kids.....wait, no...not fuck them, but you know, fuck 'em....oh craaap, this is not gonna translate well in text....I guess I could just choose not to post th '

@StarPanda @Buddyroe360 @Nabloom

Winter showed up late to work, stumbling drunk from last year, like "sup muffukkass"...

thanks...that seems easy enough

Perfect....make with the teaching

don't ask why I need to learn it....let's just say I have a tendency toward hyperbole, what my therapist prefers to label compulsive lying, and I have to cover my tracks

If you're gonna do it, at least have fun with it....put a glass of water at the base of a tall building and jump off the top while wearing a bathing suit, snorkel, and flippers....

My favorite is when a parody acct has as much or sometimes more engagement than the actual person's acct....

Don't try to change the subject....we want details....Italian orgy details....stop holdin' out on us

Nearly every iteration of Clem Fandango was taken, but I was not to be deterred

I hate Ashton Kutcher so much I could kick a baby.........and then laugh at the first person who overreacts at what I did, while I point to a camera and call him an idiot...