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UnevenEdge

Codename: Jackass

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Everything posted by Codename: Jackass

  1. Oh, they're kickin' in... somewhere...
  2. Actually, today is a bad day, because it's grocery truck day, and I fucking hate grocery truck day.
  3. The elements are patient.
  4. when man say no can lift that you look at man and say i can lift that and then lift that and then man say that was good and you say i know.
  5. I mean, come on. The Gregorian calendar which we use is an entirely human construct devised to make sense of the passing of time. Do you really think the cosmos has it out for any particular day, when all that happened was a tiny mote of dust in a corner of some galaxy moved a little bit on its trip around its unspectacular star? Miss me with that dumb shit.
  6. I haven't been in a vehicular collision since 2011.
  7. I sense another great population culling in the works, like an ice age, or a meteor, or a plague. It's long overdue, I fear. Nuclear armageddon? Space cholera? Nanobots that eat your entire body (starting with the eyes, of course)? Global flood, storm, and drought ALL AT ONCE? Why not all of them?
  8. How to remove possum from attic?
  9. Yeah, all sorts of calamities are supposed to befall the production if you say Macbeth in jest. Something to do with Shakespeare using a real witches' incantation in the play, a coven got wind of it, and cursed the name of Macbeth forevermore. I think it's hokum, but then again, when I was in high school, some of the kids were making fun and shouting Macbeth on the stage before rehearsal. Later that night one of our actors fell into orchestra pit.
  10. FRIDAY THE 13TH CHECKLIST: BREAK A MIRROR WALK UNDER A LADDER OPEN AN UMBRELLA INSIDE FIND A BLACK CAT. MAKE IT CROSS YOUR PATH SOMEHOW UTTER "MACBETH" INSIDE A THEATER. YOU KNOW, LIKE, STAGE WITH ACTORS ON IT TYPE THEATER SPILL SOME SALT AND DON'T THROW IT OVER YOUR SHOULDER AFTERWARD DON'T RESPOND TO A CHAIN LETTER PUT SHOES ON A TABLE
  11. You're barking up the wrong tree.
  12. The real bad boys just slam down three ROCKSTAR PURE ZEROTM PUNCHED FLAVOR ENERGY BEVERAGES one after the next. 720mg of caffeine, plus B-vitamins, ginseng and taurine to get rid of the withdrawals fill you with PURE CLEAN ENERGY THAT'S CLEANER AND PURER THAN WIND, WATER, SOLAR OR GEOTHERMAL. YOU'LL SWEAT, BUT THEY'LL BE COLD SWEATS. THE PALPITATIONS JUST REMIND YOU OF HOW FUCKING ALIVE YOU ARE. GET SOME
  13. You'd better just pack your bags for a week long vacation away from the boards if you post CuCl2 when the mods are awake.
  14. I'm gonna masturbate to this like I ain't got a job.
  15. Courage really didn't freak me out, but for some reason "RETURN THE SLAB" really unsettled me at the age of seven.
  16. Yeah buddy just spam the hell out of Pod 6: Redux with us for a while and you'll get there. Honestly it's nothing special. Every once in a while there's a really juicy drama thread tossed in there, but for the most part it's the same old, tired shenanigans from the usual members of our peanut gallery.
  17. who is animu grill? someone explan
  18. Books, films, vidya. Yes.
  19. Nowhere to go but down. Sell now or you'll be sorry.
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