[classic swim]

Do I still get to be your Vice President?

Used to encourage fist duking except no one knows how to actually fight anymore and it’s typically jumping anyway. So to hell with it. Wait till their back’s turned and crack their fucking cranium with a wooden baseball bat.

I could say “bullying’s just a way of life” but it’s not even that. We’re awful people. I go outside every day fully knowing not a single person values my life, and vice versa. There’s no such thing as community or compassion in the outside world and it’s every man for themself by a wide margin. Difference being we can all fantasize killing each other without needing to act out on it.

You just need a big booty in your face.

Maybe there would’ve been some type of curveball as far back as Virginia Tech or Columbine if cops and news anchors just said “lol yeah this is a broken head and sick puppy weirdo loser. Let’s not air out his shit on TV and other places for impressionable freaks to see.” But regardless, it’s happened kahjillions of fucking times since. Hopefully outlets have stopped caring about wanting to share manifestos but the damage is long done.

CC Chuck Wendig: put it in your mouth and pull.

1.) You follow him to a public restroom. He’s using a stall, and you kick that stall door down and go “you a BIG ASS BITCH!” Then you throw something at his face and run out the bathroom as fast as you can. - - - - - - - - 2.) You’re in the passenger seat of a moving car. He’s walking on the side of the road. You roll up and toss a whole plate of spaghetti at the back of his head and go “bon appétit!” in a funny Luigi voice when driving away. - - - - - - - - 3.) You run up to him as he’s going down steps, and ya do a hook kick to his ass and balls so he tumbles and busts his ass down the stairs a little bit.

Started out as me hackingly showing people stuff I taped way back when, and enough time’s passed to where some of those phone camera shots themselves are like ten years old. It’s not that I’m proud of or even ashamed of past projects, but I’ve tried to make them count for myself. Even when the passion isn’t really there anymore.

RIP random video game catching a fade over Naruto.

I was at some type of outing. Big sofa. Sofa was big enough to where I was napping, and a guy was also resting in front of me. The guy’s girl wanted to sleep on top of me. I was too tired, so I just laughed and let her do it. Minutes later, she wakes me up. Making a big fuss about me “touching her.” The lady that was just laying on top of me and my junk for however long... She tells her boyfriend in front of me. I walk with the guy in the storage room. He puffs his chest out saying to never do that shit again. Keeps talking over me when I try to defend myself. We walk out the storage room. I still try defending myself, then he whispers in my ear “you’re absolutely right, so shut the fuck up.” Then we both met up with his girl on the porch and started laughing about something random. Even though I still wanted to talk about it.

Left the VCR unplugged for months instead of just getting a replacement. Tried it today thinking it would at least give me that grace period of playing for a few minutes before ripping apart the tape. It ate it instantly as I put it in. What a fucking waste.

You gotta know which booty you wanna eat out. Can’t be Kagome.

You should eat something else.

Don’t pretend to take alcoholism seriously if you’re some fucking ditz with 24K likes on Twitter going “oh my gawl we like..literally totally LITERALLY naturalized alcoholism!” I get withdraws and need that shit to be happy. You live in a gated community and were born with a silver cock in your mouth. Stay in art school, toots.