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UnevenEdge

[classic swim]

SwimStar
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Everything posted by [classic swim]

  1. Turns into a cocky talking mule deer when a talking hillbilly fish grandma underwater calls to scream at him and call him names as she throws the fish phone against her Section 8 house underwater.
  2. Was the one to suggest we go back and edit the rap name to Explosionons. We sold 22 more records from that advice.
  3. Made 25 cents telling Papa Smurf to go live inside Rebecca’s pussy.
  4. You’d offend a lot of people.
  5. Turned into John Wick because someone called his dog a choofus.
  6. Instead of being punished, he’s rewarded with The Seight Song.
  7. He says a nice way to alleviate anxiety is to grease the ferret. He gets his pet ferret to jump in a miniature tub of chicken grease.
  8. Seight’s favorite midnight snack is the snack that smiles back. Goldfish!
  9. Interrupts a meeting by laughing exactly like this.
  10. Won a street race dressed as Yoshi.
  11. Fed his oxtails to the dog.
  12. I’d never cut off a funeral procession, but if you’re not even part of it and out here crying about “respect” wait until you find out what the people in cars opposite from you think of you any time - - all the time. You’re not the same thing as stopping for an emergency vehicle. Oh, he’s about to be rotting in the ground and I don’t know who he is. So sad... all lanes should totally stop for this.
  13. Went behind Tao’s ass in the elevator and caught his fart with a baseball mitt.
  14. Happy birthday, ghostrek. You should dance like this for a video.
  15. According to Mr. Hoonie likes to dress up as the Shoney’s Bear and eat truffles for breakfast.
  16. Saw kids playing in the middle of the road and popped her head out the car window and said “MOVE YOUR BLOODY ARSE.”
  17. According to Mr. Hoonie makes angry bull noises when his thing is pinched at under the covers.
  18. His wife ducked down to play with his balls while he peed in the toilet, he turned around at her and laughed like a horse going rhyeyyyyyheaheahea.
  19. He can only do the Snoopy dance.
  20. Someone on ASMB said “because you touch yourself at night” to him when he asked how come grocery store eggs never hatch.
  21. Turns into a talking angry werewolf puppet when asked the wrong question.
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