jackiemarie90

I've taken shots, the person decided I wasn't worth it because I wouldn't fuck them, now they're on tinder. lol I'm just a scared fucking nerd.

It's me that needs to grow up. It's me that needs to understand that people don't owe anything, and I shouldn't constantly put others before myself. Idk, I screw everything up. lol

I hate easily developing feelings for someone, I hate caring about people who don't like me back. I hate being me. Can someone please just delete mah memories already. kthanx

I always laugh at the part where Matt Damon breaks down because of the family parody. 😅

Yipee!! Turkey sandwiches for lunch

Let’s take over these capitalist overlords

Feeling like isolating myself again. lol

Idk lol

I'm trying to go by the 80/20 rule lol

I think I can?....

Like your chin and other parts? Normally I get my eyebrows and upper lip done, but I'm trying to save money right nao. lol

I mean they're might be more stories about him, but like, I'm not gonna pursue and actually am gonna start distancing myself like I always do everyone in my life. lol Idk, I need to focus on me.

I think January 11 or something 2009 lol

I always miss mine!! But congrats lol

Oh I know your alignment. lol I have my own way of viewing things, I'm an analytical historian in the social sciences. lol I think people think I romantize things when really I just try to find the humanity in everyone. It may lead me to give people chances that others don't deem worthy, but also I am no fool. I don't fall for people's bs, I simply let them spout it, and hope they reflect later on. Also the irony thing was slightly unrelated. XD

There is so much irony going on here, and I not even gonna explain it. 🤣

Thanks, I couldn't help but think it took a lot of work and therapy to get me to this head space that I am now. I'm completely a different person, mentally, than I was a dork in high school. After thinking, "He doesn't like you" I automatically thought, "No one likes you, who would" and caught myself. I immediately told myself, "That's not true, love yourself, respect yourself, do it for you". I know a lot of people suffer from depression, and it's hard to get out of our own negativity. But it isn't impossible either. With work, I think we can do a lot for ourselves mentally. But idk. I'mma do me.

Oatmeal bath?

Dam, it really be like that tho.

Hanging out with friends last night and having the first week of school together cleared my dam head. He clearly doesn't care about me, and is probably dreaming about "better" girls that are propped up in our capitalist society. I even brought one of my new close friends to hang out, and asked her afterwards, to which she replied, "Why are you asking me, you know you already know the answer. He clearly doesn't have any feelings for you." So yes, I was right when saying that he is just looking for a warm body to fucking dry hump. And you know, none of this would really even bother me, if he just didn't make me feel so dam shitty. Like, I get it, you don't kiss me, you don't even want to sit next to me in class, why would you be seen by such a dorky girl. So dorky she still has yu gi oh cards, various video game paraphernalia, and talks non stop about anime. I know I have crooked fucked up teeth, and sagging skin from weight loss. No one cares when we party if I get fucked up, but when he gets faded all the time I'm there help. No even cares about my fucking anxiety except the school disabilities services. lmao Stupid thing is, I probably would just fucked him with no attachment if hanging out with him didn't make feel like shit. But now, I really don't even want that, I don't want to be anywhere near a person who fucking treats me like dork girl who isn't worthy of discussion. I'm so glad I've never fucked him. He's been paranoid about that stupid Corona Virus so I told him today that I'm feeling sick and probably have it. And that he should stay the hell away from me. 🤣 Idk, I'll still be his friend, but probably won't him him staying over the night or even staying late. He doesn't even care about anime anyway, and I've been wanting to see Paprika for awhile now. So I'll watch that after studying. lol Edit: I know I said a lot of negative things about myself, but I don't actually believe those things. I think that's how people undervalue me. I also know, months later, those same people always come back, wanting me to give them another shot. But I'm so beyond the superficial bullshit I just don't care. You either thought I was cool, or you don't. And a lot of people underestimate me, but I just keep rising in my goals and pursuits. Being underestimated is a beautiful gift that makes life hilarious when I do better than those who thought I wasn't good enough.

I volunteer as tribute

My life is broken lol

Don’t get social advice from me >_>

I don't get too many physical symptoms before, just a random cramp, but really I just being overreacting to everything and be extra emotional than ever, than a few days later when I do get it, I just go, "Oh, I knew I wasn't a soft little bitch, it's my period" 😂