UwPp

I'm stoned on this national stoners day. Hooray for Marijuana being legalized here!

I've come to realization I attract the dumbest guys. Sir you really think you're about to show up at my house at 4 am? I think not. A bitch needs her 8+ hours of sleep to be human properly.

Just like Tesla looks like an IUD.

Decided I'm over dating apps. After failed Doberman and kinda failing retriever, I think I'm over dating. Better luck next year.

Idk what worse. Them or the locus. Either way driving through a swarm of them is like hitting a shit ton of birds or something.

Autism Awareness Walk today. American Heart Association walk tomorrow. Idk why I'm complaining rn when I walk more at Disney world than I do in a year.

Nah usually I'm screaming at the cars going down my road to slow the fuck down.

I managed to sleep for 3 or so hours. I'm running on Adderall and caffeine. ... WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Sleep and I are best friends. So much so I have to take medication so i don't sleep all the time. Come live in UwPland. Sleep all you want.

I would like to thank the tiny germ monsters for giving me the stomach bug. Puking for 24 hours has been awesome.

I'm in totality. My job is closing down at 2 for the apocalypse.

Thank you!!! That means alot.

Imagine having the eclipse through your city. Thank you apocalypse for letting me only have to work until 2.

Update, the 30+ tshirts are complete.

Me working at a cardiology office, patients still call and ask if they're okay to take. Also ask if the docs will prescribe it. I try to hold back my giggles because it's still funny thinking old people having sex. I'm still 12.

Never will I decide to tie dye 30 shirts at once. I look like I'm part of the blue man group.

@André Toulon

@André Toulon

Sir we don't allow replays.

Alright, so Doberman hasn't messaged me in a week so I'm pretty sure I'm being ghosted because I refuse to text him first and seem desperate. Going out with golden retriever again tonight for date #2. Probably not going to be as fun as Doberman after the fact but we'll find out.

Sorry, but cannibalism is kind of an ick of mine.

I watched too much adult swim. That makes me a nerd.

I was hoping the serial killer was different than the rapist. Because if he's hot, then there's some sick twisted fantasies I'd be having. Now my boner is gone.