The_annoying_one

How did a mosquito get underneath my somewhat thick long sleeve flannel shirt to bite my arm?

Wait…you had expectations for this?

Is that a serious question? He wouldn’t shut up about it for days!

Happy Birthday, Kudasai!!

I read that as “get it up to 680 pounds”. I think I need therapy now…..

I was only there first to stop him. You see, I’m really good friends with the couple that lives there. I assure you, it is nothing sexual.

You think I want his sloppy seconds? I thought you knew me better than that, man! Damn!

Green bell peppers have no place on pizza…..or anywhere, for that matter.

Some questions are better left unanswered.

You leave my mom out of this! That wasn’t my house you robbed. You see, I was actually there to rob it first. How could you sell something I don’t even have?

I did. I was just joking.

Your ding dong.

Chicken & rice.

What’s all the hubbub in here?!

Why do I keep obsessing over things I know I’ll never have?

If you haven’t noticed, I have a tendency to overstate some of my unpopular opinions. Fried isn’t the only way I’ll eat it, but it is my favorite.

The only good way to eat fish is deep fried.

Be like that? Who told my girlfriend about my sidechick? Who brought my wife into this? Nobody was ever there for me! Nobody! That was the coldest shoulder I’ve ever cried on. And it’s funny you bring up the shovel. Who charged me $25 for every single dig?!

I’ll consider it for the right price.

Too many people think “overrated” automatically means “bad”.