myth busters: boar3d edition

[discolé monade]

knows who dr pepper is, and has made the bold claim " not as cheerful as one would expect."

[The_annoying_one]

Leaked the secret of KFC’s eleven herbs and spices. The Colonel was PISSED.

[discolé monade]

knows a HUGE secret about KFC, and it WAS the colonel in the library with a candlelabara

[[classic swim]]

Wants to toss a jar of Smuckers strawberry jam at someone’s truck.

Edited May 5, 2025 by [classic swim]

[The_annoying_one]

Once smeared mayonnaise all over someone’s mailbox.

[[classic swim]]

Tao wrote an angry letter about the mayonnaise slathered onto his mailbox after tasting it.

[discolé monade]

didn't have the heart to tell TAO that it was miracle whip. 

[The_annoying_one]

Should know I would never touch Miracle Whip, that nasty crap.

[discolé monade]

and is now realizing that classic spared his feelings, as he in fact LOVES miracle whip....now. 

but don't tell ANYONE

[PhilosipherStoned]

Well shit... ruined this post I made at op. 

Hates Miracle Whip, but bathes in mustard. This dude even sent in fan mail requesting the jackass dudes to play with mustard which inevitably led to Rake Yon acquiring his mustard phobia.

 

[Seight]

Is the one that has to tell Rake Yohn to calm down

[The_annoying_one]

Dressed up as a giant bottle of mustard just to terrorize Rake Yohn.

[[classic swim]]

He wants Yoko to live inside his butt to break up the shit inside his butt.

[The_annoying_one]

Farted inside of a nursery and blamed it on the kids.

[mthor]

Starred in an infomercial for the Squatty Potty.

[Seight]

Pitched the line "You're gonna love my nuts!" in the Slap Chop commercial

[[classic swim]]

Made his own brand of milk with his namesake.

”Got Seight?”

[The_annoying_one]

Earned a life-long supply of OxyClean for mentioning Billy Mays online.

[[classic swim]]

A stripper saw him stuffing his face with club wings and asked if he knows how to use a fire extinguisher.

[Seight]

Created a website that shows which clubs actually have decent food

[discolé monade]

has forwarded said list to mr hoonie,

[The_annoying_one]

Gave Mr. Hoonie VIP access to the most exclusive club in town.

Spoiler

The “club” in question is located in the men’s room of the local Denny’s.

 

[[classic swim]]

Saw Mr. Hoonie on his knees and took the opportunity to reach his hands out and shake Mr. Hoonie’s head and face a little bit.

[Seight]

Saw Mr. Hoonie and said "What are the haps my friend?"

[The_annoying_one]

Told Mr. Hoonie how to save 15% or more on car insurance.

[discolé monade]

found out the mr. hoonie has a PhD in english lit.

[The_annoying_one]

Asked about Mr. Hoonie in the local rec center and received a lot of sideways glances.

[discolé monade]

 LOL

carries a gemstone talisman of a mini mr. hoonie. if you look closely, you'll see it's been rubbed down to a perfect skipping stone. 

[Seight]

Taught Mr. Hoonie how to throw car batteries into the ocean

[The_annoying_one]

Narrowly avoided one of those car batteries while swimming laps in the ocean.

[Doom Metal Alchemist]

Snitched on disco and Mr. Hoonie for throwing the batteries into the ocean.

[[classic swim]]

Wanted to eat the fish that got effed up from all these car batteries.

[Doom Metal Alchemist]

He caught the fish in question:

And refused to let me have it as he wanted it all for himself.

[The_annoying_one]

Tops his hamburgers with peanut butter m&m’s.

[[classic swim]]

Remembers that time in August when he tossed those raw steak strips into the garbage and saw that the sun had them fully cooked by the end of the day.

[Doom Metal Alchemist]

Ate those garbage steak strips.

[The_annoying_one]

 Bakes potatoes in the midday sun and devours them.

[[classic swim]]

Ate grilled cheese off the radiator.

[discolé monade]

showed mr. hoonie how to make the perfect grilled cheese sandwich, just like in that movie 'benny and june' 

Edited May 9, 2025 by discolé monade

[Seight]

Has done the "cooking an egg with the outside heat" trick

[The_annoying_one]

Likes to yell “Now we are cooking with fire!” whenever someone lights up a grill.

[[classic swim]]

Walked up to a 42 year old at Shakey’s and said “you even got groupies on your dick!”

[The_annoying_one]

Goes to Del Taco just to make friends, by asking “Does this boil on my ass look infected?”

[-Kudasai-]

When asked by a lady friend to talk dirty the first thing he said was "the kitchen" followed by "the bathroom" and then later "the garage"

[[classic swim]]

A prostitute barged into his hotel room while he was in the bed just so she could sniff and play with his tater tots.

[Seight]

Was the police officer that had to write that report (OF COURSE it was in Florida, where else would it be?)

[The_annoying_one]

Filmed the whole incident and didn’t blur out any of the faces because “screw the innocent”.

[-Kudasai-]

Has issued a challenge to Michael Flatley for the "Lord of the Dance" title 

[Seight]

Added Hip Hip to Line Dancing

[The_annoying_one]

Has a habit of break dancing at the worst possible times.