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UnevenEdge

Azalar Hex

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Everything posted by Azalar Hex

  1. Ah there we go. She not only removed me from her friend list, she deleted the group she created and deleted her character while I was away for a few hours. This. This is the reality I am accustomed to. Back to looking at boobs. ::scrolls up::
  2. Don't drop a duke on my artificial safe place.
  3. I was on the brink of asking about her period. But she mentioned she was married. Crisis has been averted. Now to deal with her disappointment when she finds out that I'm the kind of person who bottles their own farts and sends them to relatives.
  4. Ye gods she's at it again. Now she's talking about sports. I hate sports. Gehd stahp it. Staahhhp ittt.
  5. Is it possible to fart hard enough to propel oneself through a weightless environment while nude?
  6. There's no way I can pay attention to what you are posting with that avatar.
  7. I'm one of those people that don't do social stuff too well. Social Phobia is what it's called. It's really nerve-wracking. Think of it like being an arachnophobic sort and everyone turning into spiders that will crawl on your face if you don't say hello in their native tongue. Sexy until somebody gets a nostril full of eggs.
  8. I genuinely mean it when I say that was exhausting. Reminds me of the time in high school where two girls came over to the single table I would sit at in the corner during lunch and squeezed into the same seat across from me to ask me about myself. My mind is a total blank on what I said, but they never came back. I think they were dared to do it.
  9. I don't think this one has much of a sense of humor. One joke about dead babies and she bails. Damn, women are complicated.
  10. I'm gonna tell her about the time I clogged our sink the first time I got curious and shaved my pubes.
  11. Why would I be afraid of somebody playing with a doll? It's just bad lighting, man.
  12. Damnit. Her friend is still talking to me. I don't have the mental energy to be interesting twice in one day.
  13. Nudes would have been a good option. But thankfully she asked me about myself, which is my favorite subject. Thus the crisis has been averted. She has bailed.
  14. Guys! Help! She said she likes my personality. She's obviously a dangerous retard.
  15. I had a random female ( maybe ) message me in one of my MMOs and we are having a good conversation where I am making a good impression. This isn't normal and the pressure to continue succeeding at social is killing me. Why do I have to be so damned charming sometimes?
  16. Shows how much you know. I only do self touchin' during the day when I can watch people outside my window.
  17. It never fails. There's just enough on really good fast servers to get into the story and off to episode ten or so, and then everything is hosted on a low res horse shit "gotta rebuffer every three seconds" pus-dripping fried dog testicle of a server. Where's the rage bucket? Rants is too far away and I'm prairie doggin'.
  18. I woke up one morning back in the 90s to an irritating beeping noise that would happen every few minutes. Eventually found my cousin's virtual pet keychain on the table depicting a dog and about six piles of dookie. I put a pillow on top of it to muffle the noise and went back to sleep. It died later that day. Not my responsibility.
  19. I stood in a city once. It smelled like pee.
  20. I play with a slightly misshapen action figure of unknown origin named "Doctor Foothand".
  21. Nobody here plays chess.
  22. That's not a cigarette ...
  23. If a conversation with a woman that starts with "Can I see those boobs?" doesn't end with immediate boobs, you are wasting your time.
  24. If I had friends to go to the movies with I wouldn't have been able to secretly jack it in the back row during Grumpier Old Men.
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