Zenigundam

My fellow alpha Ric... has arrived. 😐

I'm not worried about them, dude, I'm worried about my fellow Earthlings being protected when several cops get dropped with smooth uppercuts because they stuck their noses where they didn't belong. 😦💪🐻💗

The only reason I don't wanna call her parents is because her dad is going to overreact and he might make me restrain him, which could bring up the issue of my bench warrant if meddling interlopers get involved. 😐

Should I call the cops? My GF disappeared from OKC and I was the last one she talked to. This is sooooo creepy. Please find my GF. 😦💏🏆

Is this girl ever gonna log back in? Wtf

She can't do that. We're madly in love. If I cheat on her with a sexy, legal age teen, then I can see her doing that though. Wow I'm so socially skilled and in control. 💪

At least say that it's based on a true story. I'm still in shock over this.

We liked each other's profiles last night, but I mean she is really hot think prime Denise Richards looks, but that's fine because that's my league being a sexy alpha male and all. Wow and the bod on her is incredible, maybe I should cut down to 175 of muscle so that if we do get it on she likes the feel of my tummy over her better. The downside? She's 25. 😐 I really don't wanna date a cougar, but she's impressed me so much since last night with the mutual liking of profiles and whatnot, just waiting for her to log back in. 🐰

Seems like a good boyfriend for Mary

"Corner me against the wall." *takes notes for future OkCupid encounters*

Wow and the main character is literally a lone wolf. I'm going to contact them and possibly sue because they just ripped off my identity to make millions on a movie. They didn't even disguise it well. 🤦‍♂️😐👊

Earth, Wind, and Fire

This supposed to be a Speed Racer parody?

Ah ok this is getting pretty good. I kinda have something for that frog girl. 💏

It makes Jurassic Park look so dated and weak, wow Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is a cinematic masterpiece that will be talked about for millennia to follow. If you don't agree, you're just stuck in the past and lie to yourself by saying that beta ass Tropic Thunder is funnier than the worst Adam Sandler movie.

Please stop cursing, Pat. 😦

Weekend, guys!!! Let's get it!!! Except for, you beta males. 🐻👊💪🍺🍔

Probably some. 😏

He-Man muscles, I'm a combination of Sage Northcutt and The Rock never forget that.

Scoob, take a step back. *approaches Fireball shots smoothly lingering on breath*

This ain't Christine, you nerd, and I said cat not car wow is this where America's at and you guys are a generation or two older than I am 😡

A cat, wow you guys need to read more books.

He was stray though and he wouldn't let me pet him. That got me mad. 🐺

Watch your mouth, bro... 😦👊🏋️‍♂️

Wow Lion O really came through.