Skinko

YOU ARE A HOMOSEXUAL

Pneumonia.

Coolest place I've been is Knotts Berry Farm in California. It has some dope rollercoasters. Also it's in Los Angeles, which, you know... fuck yeah. "Least cool" I think technically would have to be Battle Lake in Minnesota, but if you like fishing, which I do, it's a fun spot.

Except for the Croatians. God damn those Croatians.

Well, what the hell did Syria ever do to deserve that?

Recently, I've found it fun to exit conversations by saying "Well, I'm gonna go masturbate in the kitchen," and walking away.

That's actually one of my favorite things to say with absolutely no enthusiasm in my tone.

No one wants anything more than I want pancakes most of the time.

You got a pain in your shess and you can't breef?

The couple? No. They just got me a little closer to home. But I super appreciated it. I even offered the guy a blowjob. That's not true, I didn't do that. I totally should've, tho.

But I had to walk 60 miles to get here. It was cool, though. A kind couple named Paco and Mariah gave me a ride part of the way.

Who is Miss Conduct, and is she single?

I just walked 55 miles. My all of it hurts. What did you nerds do today? Anything fun?

For an alcoholic, I know shockingly little about beer types. I can tell you how much it would take to get me drunk based on ABV. But that's about it.

That's really funny.

Don't think I ever tried it. Most beers with the word Bock in the name tend to be decent tho.

Just the smell of it makes me dry heave. I don't know how I drank that garbage for so long.

oh golly wow ok

FUCK YEAH

Proof it

She's a chubby ol' broad, that Earth.

Well, I got a blowjob in the school bathroom when I was in 7th grade. I guess that's the weirdest place I've ever done anything sex related. Best? Meh, it's all pretty standard other than that.

No offense, The Planet.

That's all I can ask of you.