Mode 7

I know I have to wait until Wednesday for the technician to come out and fix this fucking Internet but all I want to do is watch TV but the Wi-Fi just doesn't want to cooperate. I'm getting very very close to taking a hammer to this goddamn modem. Pray for me.

Tried to ride in a pouch of a kangaroo

Likes to brag to complete strangers on how well he parallel parks

Time to shave, this goatee is starting to get on my nerves.

Got super excited when he found out that he was going to Jupiter but was soon disappointed when learned that he was going to Jupiter, Florida and not planet Jupiter.

Plans on running for mayor of Hell, Michigan

I hate reading assembling instructions. I've reached the point where I'll only look up the names of the parts and put the shit together by studying the picture on the box. I did that with bbq grill last year but I wouldn't recommend doing it like that though I just got lucky

I've been having problems with my Wi-Fi for weeks now and I haven't been getting the help that I needed fromy provider. I've called them for at least five or six times for weeks and I'm still having problems. I'm paying close to 100 dollars and this is the crappy service I'm getting? Finally I just had enough, my internet cuts out yesterday and twice this morning so I called them again. It took every ounce of self control not to explode on them but I just had to say the magic words "I'm a dissatisfied customer" and boom they're finally sending a technician over. I swear if didn't need wi-fi to watch television I would just do away with this shit all together and save myself some money.

Fired a warning shot at classic swim with her crossbow because he did not heed her warning about crowing outside her window in his chicken suit.

I'm just going to have burgers tonight, I don't feel like anything elaborate for dinner tonight

I always see this commerical everytime I watch something on MeTV Toons and all I keep thinking is this guy sounds like he would be an entertaining wrestling manager and speaking of managers, I feel that managers need to become a thing in wrestling again because not everyone can talk or should be talking on the mic.

The last of the NY steak strips and some mushroom flavored rice

Lost his virginity in a porta potty

Thought porterhouse was a place where you store porta potties

Is taking flying lessons to prove to the world that people in chicken suits can actually fly

Goes up to random people on the street and says