[classic swim]

I did! Twice! She eventually wandered off before I could really do anything.

They made those shorts later into the 60s and they were dog water.

Surprised this vid still exists. It had... more bitrates when I last saw it.

Burrrrrrrrrrrrrtt

Outside sipping champagne and this adorable alley kitty made herself at home on my lap for me to pet her. I’m too irresponsible to care for her but don’t really know what to do besides say what a good kitty she is. Tried kissing my face multiple times and I wouldn’t go for that.

You have to eat your grandma’s hunta for breakfast.

Actually I just fired you.

Bar food!

Mafia 1’s reboot wasn’t terrible but it wasn’t good either in retrospect. Even discounting the Mafia 3 style coding. I liked that there was no ambiguity as to whether Sam killed Paulie himself, but hated that they made Paulie an incel Joe Barbaro. I liked that Tommy Angelo accepted his death gracefully, but hated how a guy gets a shotgun blast to the fucking stomach and gives a wimpy monologue to his kids before the credits.

He’s coming. Watch your back.

He actually spoke to me in private and said you’re gonna get your asscheeks clapped...

I hope it’s just sparkle wine that gives me toothaches and not the champagne. Champagne’s my favorite since malt licky, I just hate having to eat stuff primarily using my tongue when I take great care of my teeth otherwise.

You’re too hard to please!

Early happy hour at the bar, and then my friends invited me to swim. I haven’t gone swimming in years! Their pool is exactly like Tony Soprano’s pool!

Bar food!

That’d be pretty funny if someone on the interstate decided to crash their car into another because it’d be funny to piss them off.

He makes all the sexy ladies go “Seiiiiiiiiiggghhhhhht! Have more sex with us! Please!”

Carries the wooden stick that killed Teddy Roosevelt.