Clu Posted March 24, 2018 Share Posted March 24, 2018 I got that app on my Samsung phone that takes a picture of whoever puts my unlock code in wrong, it takes the picture and emails it to me if the correct code isn't put in within ten seconds of the first attempt. So, I am making a delicious salmon dish for dinner, with spinach and roasted radishes (keto, remember? fuck off) and I go up to take a shit, and my girlfriends sisters boyfriend tried getting in my phone! I didn't know this at first until about 20 minutes ago when I checked my email and I see his dumb ass face looking at my phone. Now, what to do? Do i call him on it? Do I have sex with his girlfriend (that could really spice things up), or do I just chill. Idk, man.... I bet he has a great reason for it too, he has an iPhone so he can't even be like, "Yo, I thought it was my phone!", bitch your iPhone is old and busted as fuck. Where my whiskey at, ima get torn up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fuggnificent Posted March 24, 2018 Share Posted March 24, 2018 Thats fucked up. Show your gf and let her decide since thats her sister man. I wouldnt let them back in my house. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clu Posted March 24, 2018 Author Share Posted March 24, 2018 Just now, fuggnificent said: Thats fucked up. Show your gf and let her decide since thats her sister man. I wouldnt let them back in my house. Nah, shes a maternity nurse, so she is way too nurturing and shit.... He is a 5' 1" asian kid..... I am going to fuck with him I think. Maybe forward him the email from one of my burner email accounts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Distortedreasoning Posted March 24, 2018 Share Posted March 24, 2018 i vote for sex with his gf. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clu Posted March 24, 2018 Author Share Posted March 24, 2018 1 minute ago, Distortedreasoning said: i vote for sex with his gf. I knew a voice of reason would come through... I thought it would be Zeni.... but I will take this too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fuggnificent Posted March 24, 2018 Share Posted March 24, 2018 15 minutes ago, Clu said: Nah, shes a maternity nurse, so she is way too nurturing and shit.... He is a 5' 1" asian kid..... I am going to fuck with him I think. Maybe forward him the email from one of my burner email accounts. He either wont know what it is or realize its you. If you tell his gf she might realize what scum he is and dump him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katt_goddess Posted March 24, 2018 Share Posted March 24, 2018 Send him a pic of your anus with a message 'My phone takes pics of strangers, this look familiar?' 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clu Posted March 24, 2018 Author Share Posted March 24, 2018 Just now, katt_goddess said: Send him a pic of your anus with a message 'My phone takes pics of strangers, this look familiar?' Best idea yet. I had four people I was going to send my starfish to tonight anyways, what's one more? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crackymckrackin Posted March 24, 2018 Share Posted March 24, 2018 Just now, katt_goddess said: Send him a pic of your anus with a message 'My phone takes pics of strangers, this look familiar?' This^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Distortedreasoning Posted March 24, 2018 Share Posted March 24, 2018 6 minutes ago, Clu said: I knew a voice of reason would come through... I thought it would be Zeni.... but I will take this too. im always the voice of reason around here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clu Posted March 24, 2018 Author Share Posted March 24, 2018 Just now, Distortedreasoning said: im always the voice of reason around here. Easy tiger. This is the first time you have helped me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnimationFan14 Posted March 24, 2018 Share Posted March 24, 2018 25 minutes ago, Clu said: Nah, shes a maternity nurse, so she is way too nurturing and shit.... He is a 5' 1" asian kid..... I am going to fuck him I think. Sounds like a plan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discolé monade Posted March 25, 2018 Share Posted March 25, 2018 if it were me....and this is me. i would straight up ask...'dude, find what you were looking for on my phone?" now...of course douche would be like 'what are you talking about' *this is the point it would take every grain of energy i had to not throat punch him* and then i'd show him the pic. let it unravel from there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discolé monade Posted March 25, 2018 Share Posted March 25, 2018 1 hour ago, katt_goddess said: Send him a pic of your anus with a message 'My phone takes pics of strangers, this look familiar?' fuck it. or this. but...send it while he's standing with you/by you. cheers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clu Posted March 25, 2018 Author Share Posted March 25, 2018 I puss'd out and let it go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codename: Jackass Posted March 25, 2018 Share Posted March 25, 2018 Tell that nosy motherfucker to stop messing with things that don't belong to him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clu Posted March 25, 2018 Author Share Posted March 25, 2018 4 minutes ago, empty said: Tell that nosy motherfucker to stop messing with things that don't belong to him. See.... this exposes me though, why do I have the app? (would be the first question I would have, in my head) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codename: Jackass Posted March 25, 2018 Share Posted March 25, 2018 Because if your phone gets stolen you'd like to have a picture of the thief. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codename: Jackass Posted March 25, 2018 Share Posted March 25, 2018 Or if someone's trying to get into your phone to steal your info like banking or shopping credentials, you'd like to know who it is. Really it's nobody's damn business what you do with your phone as long as you're not distributing CP or teaching people how to make bombs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clu Posted March 25, 2018 Author Share Posted March 25, 2018 2 minutes ago, empty said: Or if someone's trying to get into your phone to steal your info like banking or shopping credentials, you'd like to know who it is. Really it's nobody's damn business what you do with your phone as long as you're not distributing CP or teaching people how to make bombs. The former isn't of concern. I have nefarious deeds that I do, digitally. That exactly why I have the app, it gives me a googles maps of whoever tried to unlock it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lupin_bebop Posted March 25, 2018 Share Posted March 25, 2018 10 hours ago, katt_goddess said: Send him a pic of your anus with a message 'My phone takes pics of strangers, this look familiar?' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clu Posted March 25, 2018 Author Share Posted March 25, 2018 3 minutes ago, lupin_bebop said: LB, you need new gifs..SEENT IT! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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