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Hate this time of year


Derackthehunter

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Since 2004, I began dreading this time of season because my grandfather died in the early part of fall. It took a huge toll on me, especially because his death was the biggest loss I ever had. It wasn't like I never experienced loss before my grandfather died. Because he was my father figure, it was a major loss.

I also think about other people, who lost their family members before, during, and after the holidays. For example, our relatives from Detroit called to let us know, that my great-uncle died from cancer yesterday. Because I know what it's like to lose immediate family around this time of the season, I feel badly for my cousins, great-aunt, and grandmother.

Families, friends, and pets dying around this time of the year is always the worst because people will always be reminded of their deaths, during this time of the year. Family members dying on the actual holidays makes it worse. Nowadays, I dread hearing Christmas Music because I, as well as many others are reminded of the times of joy with family members, friends, and pets that are dead.

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1 minute ago, PurgatoryGirl said:

Since 2004, I began dreading this time of season because my grandfather died in the early part of fall. It took a huge toll on me, especially because his death was the biggest loss I ever had. It wasn't like I never experienced loss before my grandfather died. Because he was my father figure, it was a major loss.

I also think about other people, who lost their family members before, during, and after the holidays. For example, our relatives from Detroit called to let us know, that my great-uncle died from cancer yesterday. Because I know what it's like to lose immediate family around this time of the season, I feel badly for my cousins, great-aunt, and grandmother.

Families, friends, and pets dying around this time of the year is always the worst because people will always be reminded of their deaths, during this time of the year. Family members dying on the actual holidays makes it worse. Nowadays, I dread hearing Christmas Music because I, as well as many others are reminded of the times of joy with family members, friends, and pets that are dead.

Death is a big part of why I hate this time of year. A few years ago my dad died then a year or so after that I had to put of one my cats to sleep and just about a week and a half ago I had to put his brother to sleep as well. There are other reasons why I hate this time of year but the deaths stay fresh.

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2 minutes ago, Derackthehunter said:

Death is a big part of why I hate this time of year. A few years ago my dad died then a year or so after that I had to put of one my cats to sleep and just about a week and a half ago I had to put his brother to sleep as well. There are other reasons why I hate this time of year but the deaths stay fresh.

Exactly. The first few months or so are always the worst part, after someone dies. Other people can't necessarily empathize unless they have personally lived through tragedy during the holidays. It's a hard pill to swallow. All the while, there are those types of people, who want to label us as being "Scrooges" because we're not bouncing off the walls with excitement about celebrating the holidays the way THEY want us to celebrate it.

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1 minute ago, PurgatoryGirl said:

Exactly. The first few months or so are always the worst part, after someone dies. Other people can't necessarily empathize unless they have personally lived through tragedy during the holidays. It's a hard pill to swallow. All the while, there are those types of people, who want to label us as being "Scrooges" because we're not bouncing off the walls with excitement about celebrating the holidays the way THEY want us to celebrate it.

Well to be fair I've never been a fan of this time of year, I find that everyone acts very fake just for the sake of possibly getting something from someone else. Plus the cold fucking hate the cold. Just recently a buddy of mine got rear ended while I was with him and while the car is fine he was told he might need surgery.  So yeah it's just a wonderful time of year

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5 minutes ago, Derackthehunter said:

Well to be fair I've never been a fan of this time of year, I find that everyone acts very fake just for the sake of possibly getting something from someone else. Plus the cold fucking hate the cold. Just recently a buddy of mine got rear ended while I was with him and while the car is fine he was told he might need surgery.  So yeah it's just a wonderful time of year

I used to love this time of the year but that all changed within the last 13-17 years because of deaths and a traumatic incident, that personally happened to me.

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2 minutes ago, PurgatoryGirl said:

I used to love this time of the year but that all changed within the last 13-17 years because of deaths and a traumatic incident, that personally happened to me.

I've been hating it ever since I had to shovel and all of the reasons I mentioned in the post previously which was all superficial reasons to hate it. Then I had the losses and like many people it just tainted it for me so I dread it every single year now.

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Late spring and summer because that's when my anemia tanks, and I'm more likely to end up in the ER due to medical issues caused by that. That's also when I'm surrounded by my deadly allergy, so I have to carry a bottle of benedryl at all times(even during fall/winter because Georgia's random warm days bring out bees and hornets) and hope for the best. Christmas Day can be hard because I hate watching my mom get depressed since that was the day she flew home to my uncle's funeral who died very quickly from cancer.

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1 minute ago, SorceressPol said:

Late spring and summer because that's when my anemia tanks, and I'm more likely to end up in the ER due to medical issues caused by that. That's also when I'm surrounded by my deadly allergy, so I have to carry a bottle of benedryl at all times(even during fall/winter because Georgia's random warm days bring out bees and hornets) and hope for the best. Christmas Day can be hard because I hate watching my mom get depressed since that was the day she flew home to my uncle's funeral who died very quickly from cancer.

That's got to be tough, seems like you have a lot of things working against you around those months. Nothing helps with the anemia during that period of time?

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2 minutes ago, Derackthehunter said:

I've been hating it ever since I had to shovel and all of the reasons I mentioned in the post previously which was all superficial reasons to hate it. Then I had the losses and like many people it just tainted it for me so I dread it every single year now.

Yeah, raking leaves, shoveling snow, and the cold weather is a major annoyance, but I have lived through much worse. This past winter, we have been very fortunate to not have so much snow. It mostly rained throughout the winter earlier this year, which was very abnormal for us. Not that I'm complaining about it. In fact, I hope we have less snow again this time.

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4 minutes ago, PurgatoryGirl said:

Yeah, raking leaves, shoveling snow, and the cold weather is a major annoyance, but I have lived through much worse. This past winter, we have been very fortunate to not have so much snow. It mostly rained throughout the winter earlier this year, which was very abnormal for us. Not that I'm complaining about it. In fact, I hope we have less snow again this time.

See I also love that we've (on occasion) been getting less snow and it's been happening deeper into winter but that just sets off a whole other set of alarm bells. Global warming baby.

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10 minutes ago, SorceressPol said:

Late spring and summer because that's when my anemia tanks, and I'm more likely to end up in the ER due to medical issues caused by that. That's also when I'm surrounded by my deadly allergy, so I have to carry a bottle of benedryl at all times(even during fall/winter because Georgia's random warm days bring out bees and hornets) and hope for the best. Christmas Day can be hard because I hate watching my mom get depressed since that was the day she flew home to my uncle's funeral who died very quickly from cancer.

Do you take Vitamin B12 and Ferrous Sulfate tablets for your anemia? If not, you should. I had to take them years ago for my anemia because I was missing 1/2 my blood platelets.

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8 minutes ago, Derackthehunter said:

That's got to be tough, seems like you have a lot of things working against you around those months. Nothing helps with the anemia during that period of time?

Through trial and error, I've learned that I have to eat vitamins like candy, drink a ton of gatorade, can't go out in the sun for long if it's 83+, and ask for help before I get to the 'Everything has a green haze' phase.

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2 minutes ago, SorceressPol said:

Through trial and error, I've learned that I have to eat vitamins like candy, drink a ton of gatorade, can't go out in the sun for long if it's 83+, and ask for help before I get to the 'Everything has a green haze' phase.

That really sucks, I know leafy greens help with anemia. I would assume you'll probably move somewhere where the temp doesn't stay at 83+ for very long

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3 minutes ago, Derackthehunter said:

That really sucks, I know leafy greens help with anemia. I would assume you'll probably move somewhere where the temp doesn't stay at 83+ for very long

Those options are lessening due to global warming like you brought up earlier, so I'm not eager to move anywhere until I have enough money to make better plans. It'll probably be less sucky for me once I get tested for Ehlers Danlos. I'm a bendy person with fucked up joints and organs that don't act right, so the diagnosis and treatment for it would be very helpful for me.

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22 minutes ago, PurgatoryGirl said:

Yeah, raking leaves, shoveling snow, and the cold weather is a major annoyance, but I have lived through much worse. This past winter, we have been very fortunate to not have so much snow. It mostly rained throughout the winter earlier this year, which was very abnormal for us. Not that I'm complaining about it. In fact, I hope we have less snow again this time.

I feel so bad for folks when they do all that shoveling and then get hit by another snow storm a day or two later.

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4 minutes ago, SorceressPol said:

Those options are lessening due to global warming like you brought up earlier, so I'm not eager to move anywhere until I have enough money to make better plans. It'll probably be less sucky for me once I get tested for Ehlers Danlos. I'm a bendy person with fucked up joints and organs that don't act right, so the diagnosis and treatment for it would be very helpful for me.

I've never heard of that, but it sounds like it's pretty serious. I hope you can get it confirmed soon so you can get the treatment you need.

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1 minute ago, SorceressPol said:

I feel so bad for folks when they do all that shoveling and then get hit by another snow storm a day or two later.

Sometimes when we have blizzards, we have to shovel snow at least 2-3 times within 1 day. Talk about getting a workout. I'm normally flinging snow 6 feet high in the air with my shovel. It's worse when there's water in the snow because the water in it makes shoveling snow harder.

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4 minutes ago, PurgatoryGirl said:

Sometimes when we have blizzards, we have to shovel snow at least 2-3 times within 1 day. Talk about getting a workout. I'm normally flinging snow 6 feet high in the air with my shovel. It's worse when there's water in the snow because the water in it makes shoveling snow harder.

This is why I'm glad my grandma went to an assisted living place because I was afraid she'd slip and fall while shoveling snow outside her house or have a stroke.

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1 minute ago, SorceressPol said:

This is why I'm glad my grandma went to an assisted living place because I was afraid she'd slip and fall while shoveling snow outside her house or have a stroke.

Sometimes they report on our local news about the elderly dying from strokes and heart attacks because they were shoveling too much snow.

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8 hours ago, Derackthehunter said:

It never fails, every year when it starts getting colder I get hit with tons of bullshit to deal with. It's also spreading to people I know too which is fantastic.

 

Does there seem to be a specific time of year that just fucks you over?

 

I have to think I'm not the only one.

September....my birth month is always fucked

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A girlfriend I used to regularly date passed away on December 26, 2011--the day after Christmas. I haven't gotten over it, and I never will.

Because of this, the sights, sounds and smells around Christmas sicken me. I don't decorate and I don't put up anything red or green, and I don't play Christmas music.

Next to late August (when I was born), December is just plain bullshit.

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Since last week, I could feel a great sense of mourning. Old and depressing songs I haven't listened to in YEARS randomly got stuck in my head.

Elfen Lied's "Lilium" has been stuck in my head the most for the last 48 hours to 2 weeks. Then, like I said earlier, we got a phone call from relatives on Thanksgiving, saying that my grandmother's brother died from cancer. She is heartbroken, right now.

My guide has been sending me messages, since last Thursday. It's always horrible to have family members die on a holiday meant for families.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17-az4wK1Z4

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13 hours ago, Gyaos said:

A girlfriend I used to regularly date passed away on December 26, 2011--the day after Christmas. I haven't gotten over it, and I never will.

Because of this, the sights, sounds and smells around Christmas sicken me. I don't decorate and I don't put up anything red or green, and I don't play Christmas music.

Next to late August (when I was born), December is just plain bullshit.

I know that feeling all to well. Makes you want to avoid everything all together.

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4 hours ago, PurgatoryGirl said:

Since last week, I could feel a great sense of mourning. Old and depressing songs I haven't listened to in YEARS randomly got stuck in my head.

Elfen Lied's "Lilium" has been stuck in my head the most for the last 48 hours to 2 weeks. Then, like I said earlier, we got a phone call from relatives on Thanksgiving, saying that my grandmother's brother died from cancer. She is heartbroken, right now.

My guide has been sending me messages, since last Thursday. It's always horrible to have family members die on a holiday meant for families.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17-az4wK1Z4

It just hangs a dark cloud over the whole season. For every moment of joy you think of it's followed by a moment of loss.

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11 hours ago, Derackthehunter said:

It just hangs a dark cloud over the whole season. For every moment of joy you think of it's followed by a moment of loss.

Yes, exactly. Regardless of everything, I still celebrate the holidays and birthdays. You can't stay miserable for too long. You have to find some kind of joy in something, again.:)

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