Skiles

How often do you watch your sets back and take notes?

Lucky you. My cousin's husband is like 47, and he looked way young for a long time. Then one day he just looked super old.

I prefer the term "cracker-ass cracker."

Stop quoting her in my damn thread! I have her blocked so I can't see her derail my shit with stupidity.

Dude. I'm gonna need some ketchup for all these harshbrowns you're dishing out.

That's true. At least if it doesn't crack straight out of the gate. I envy it, to be honest. I think most white people just straight up look their age.

Or they look old their entire lives? Like, a black dude can look like he's in his 20s until he's well into his 50s, or even into his 60s, but then age hits him REAL quick. Or it's the opposite (kind of), where they look like they're old as fuck from age 19 on, and it just gets worse, like Greg Oden. 😐

That happens to me sometimes with my mom. Mostly when I hear about some kid being a little turd to their parent(s). It makes me remember all the times I was an asshole to her. Admittedly, the good times vastly outweigh the bad, in my case. But good ol' Depression Brain likes to play tricks, y'know?

String theory.

I think locally, they recently made it legal to set them off a week before and a week after the July 4. So now, instead of hearing them a week before and a week after, I hear them for a fucking month, because apparently fireworks are WAY more fun when you do them outside of the designated legal times.

There's never a good school shooting when you need it.

Where's Cix when you need him?

I say, keep your foot relations behind closed doors. Don't advertise it, don't try to convert me, and don't try to poison the youth of this great nation with your foot agenda.

You're welcome. I worked really hard on them. 😇

My dogs hate balloons too. You are not invited to our Christmas party. ☹️

Or a terrorist. Or both...?

I actually distinctly remember being like eight years old, and a couple of my friends and I decided to make a bomb out of household objects. It didn't work, but imagine the turn my life could've taken.

Oh, this dude's about to shoot up a mall. Or a maternity ward.

What do you mean? Wendy's is everywhere. It's literally impossible to find better food anywhere on Earth than Wendy's.

There was a time in my life when I really enjoyed fireworks. Then when I was 10, I got a dog. After seeing how much dogs are afraid of them, it turned me sour on the whole thing. Then later in life, I met a lot of war veterans with PTSD, and it's really, really tough for them too. And that made me really hate them. So now, I feel that if you light fireworks, you're a douchebag, and there are no exceptions.

I cannot fathom how standing up and aiming at the bowl is more convenient than sitting down and letting it all just go the way it goes. But hey, you do you.

What am I, some kind of female? Gross. Also pockets are way more convenient than purses. The only reason purses exist is because most women's clothes don't have actual functioning pockets. It's a God damn conspiracy, and it goes ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP

Nah, he got out in October 2017. 30 was the high end of the time they gave him, but he got out earlier.

Have you ever tried to shit in a bottle?