🍬Candy🍬

In the past 5 year ill say i have left or lost anything other than my debit card twice and the restaurant always had it and gave it back. First time the next morning...second time the same day. I am forever THINKING i left my phone somewhere. I only left it at work once and i drove all the way back, 30 minutes, to get it. My memory is shit so i "lose" a lot of shit at home but i eventually find it. Also my mom moves my things and i lose a lot of stuff at home because of it. The worst example is she moved my favorite bluetooth head phones. Took me over a year to find them and then when i did the battery was forever dead and they wouldn't charge anymore.

Awww. Im old enough to have never needed an email in highschool or middle school.

Dont help. Shut up scoob.

My pussy smells like lillies bitch. Febreeze u putrid hairy weenus motherfucker

Omg lol

Why 8 hours? Lol

Ok who else is obsessed over these 8 hours

Shut up scoob

Many things can mess up your pimp game as a hoe. Thinking back to my hoe days, the following things ruined my mojo and were as welcomed as bed bugs: Bleeding outside perioding days (altho if a motherfucker wont fuck u cuz you bleeding, hes a weak ass pussy bitch) Having a bad cold Phone acting up..not getting all your text messages or getting them late (getting the 3am "u up?" message during the day when the dick has moved on. Goddamn!) Leaving phone at home and seeing your favorite fuckbuddy messaged you when you obsessively check your call logs thru the tmobile website. Fuck! Im horny, too. Being out of town when the fuckbuddy wanna hit it. Dammit baby i will be back Sunday nite! Birthdays and holidays. Altho the hoeist of hoes will not care...i am not in service on holidays. Missing a hair appointment or a bad hair day. The fuckbuddy MUSNT SEE YOU SLIPPIN. ESPECIALLY IF THE MAIN BITCH IS ALMOST CUTE AND NEVER SLIPS Car trouble. Altho if yo pussy good he should offer to fix your car. Or at least try. Male friends. Especially messy ones who will check your text messages when you in the bathroom. LOCK YOUR PHONE. Turn off the message preview, damn. Bitches who are nastier than you. (Shes been licking his ass. He likes it and now wants you to do it. Eewww . That nasty ass hoe.)

Someone didn't watch the video in the OP

I wore them too but i dont remember how cuz now they fall right out my hair

still depressed Takes me all day to shower My creativity is dead BUT I DONT FEEL LIKE SHIT FOR ONCE! How are you feeling, babies?

Finally got one. Mmm so good! Way better than pumpkin spice. So smooth!

In what way

Ssshhh they made a huge prude a mod. Don't say the obvious .

Ive had many cats and no problems with their fur. You guys need to groom your kitties more.

Never heard of it

Pshh I WISH i was selling those! Id clean up! No its uber half useless stuff thats extremely expensive.

Nobody send their kid out getting sigs door to door anymore. Its way too unsafe. Parents do all the work.

Is this my beautiful wife? Is this my beautiful house?

Fundraisers Last year i had like 9 coworkers agree and pay for shit then the school had issues caused by a hurricane and it took forever for me to deliver the stuff Well no more! I really dont want to go back to work and beg people again this year. I think i might pretend to get signatures and then just buy the stuff myself out of my savings

It is nice

I don't have to. Im a black woman. I can bring her to tears with mere words. She can have it. I have a bunch of drinks tonight and was going to try that second.

Well im not finding out tonight. The child has taken it.

Wait. What kinda cookies?