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UnevenEdge

Professor Snape was a vengeful simping incel


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Posted (edited)

Snape took out more than a decade’s worth of impotent rage out on a child because he was cucked by his Chad dad. All it took for Harry to shut him up was finding out that he kept asking his mom for her feet pics back in high school. 

Edited by Jiro_Dreams
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Posted
4 minutes ago, Jiro_Dreams said:

Snape took out more than a decade’s worth of impotent rage out on a child because he was cucked by his Chad dad. All it took for Harry to shut him up was finding out that he kept asking his mom for her feet pics back in high school. 

How long have you been holding this in?

Posted
2 minutes ago, Sawdamizer said:

How long have you been holding this in?

There’s a lot about HP that’s ridiculous, but Snape being outed as a nice guy in high school ranks up there. 

What bothers me more is the timeline between when wizards shat on the floor and when Moaning Myrtle was killed by a basilisk in the bathroom. 

Or the basement demons they just stowaway to murder any unsuspecting children because they are Hagrid’s pets.

Or how they tally points only if someone catches you in the act and is cool enough to give your House credit. 

Or how the story is a 90’s period piece and most of the cast died around the same time as Princess Diana.

Posted
9 minutes ago, Jiro_Dreams said:

There’s a lot about HP that’s ridiculous, but Snape being outed as a nice guy in high school ranks up there. 

What bothers me more is the timeline between when wizards shat on the floor and when Moaning Myrtle was killed by a basilisk in the bathroom. 

Or the basement demons they just stowaway to murder any unsuspecting children because they are Hagrid’s pets.

Or how they tally points only if someone catches you in the act and is cool enough to give your House credit. 

Or how the story is a 90’s period piece and most of the cast died around the same time as Princess Diana.

This is all good.

Get it out.

 

Posted

Simping is not Millennial's slang...Ball and MJG were using it in the 80-90s and I'm sure they didn't invent it.

Guess I'll add this to the twerking/harlem shake files.

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Posted
4 hours ago, Jiro_Dreams said:

There’s a lot about HP that’s ridiculous, but Snape being outed as a nice guy in high school ranks up there. 

What bothers me more is the timeline between when wizards shat on the floor and when Moaning Myrtle was killed by a basilisk in the bathroom. 

Or the basement demons they just stowaway to murder any unsuspecting children because they are Hagrid’s pets.

Or how they tally points only if someone catches you in the act and is cool enough to give your House credit. 

Or how the story is a 90’s period piece and most of the cast died around the same time as Princess Diana.

All valid pointa, but what's wrong with it taking place in the 90s?

Posted
31 minutes ago, Hajime said:

All valid pointa, but what's wrong with it taking place in the 90s?

It adds charm to it, but in Deathly Hallows, the Hogwarts Express is scheduled to leave the day after Princess Diana’s death.

The muggle world and Hogwarts were apparently just snoozing during one of the largest British news stories of the 90’s. There’s not even an acknowledgment that on top of all the tragedies caused by Voldemort in the book, the UK is in mourning. 

Posted
11 minutes ago, Jiro_Dreams said:

It adds charm to it, but in Deathly Hallows, the Hogwarts Express is scheduled to leave the day after Princess Diana’s death.

The muggle world and Hogwarts were apparently just snoozing during one of the largest British news stories of the 90’s. There’s not even an acknowledgment that on top of all the tragedies caused by Voldemort in the book, the UK is in mourning. 

Why would some muggle slut be relevant?

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Posted
18 minutes ago, Jiro_Dreams said:

It adds charm to it, but in Deathly Hallows, the Hogwarts Express is scheduled to leave the day after Princess Diana’s death.

The muggle world and Hogwarts were apparently just snoozing during one of the largest British news stories of the 90’s. There’s not even an acknowledgment that on top of all the tragedies caused by Voldemort in the book, the UK is in mourning. 

Oh . . . well, Voldemort made attendance compulsory in Deathly Hallows. Dementors were also flying everywhere in Britain and even muggles were feeling down. Maybe that's how Rowling made a reference to her death, as explicitly stating it would probably be considered distatsteful.

Posted (edited)
10 hours ago, Jiro_Dreams said:

Snape took out more than a decade’s worth of impotent rage out on a child because he was cucked by his Chad dad. All it took for Harry to shut him up was finding out that he kept asking his mom for her feet pics back in high school. 

To add more on to this, Harry was so touched by Snape's wanting feet pics that he named his first son with the same color eyes as Lily's after him and the gay wizard. Truly touching.

Edited by Hajime
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