fuggstop

yes the tides have turned. youd totally be cool

hilarious im still getting me a fingerling monkey before i die. maybe take the $4000 out of madison's college fund. the monkey will replace her when she leaves me forever.

wait until the food supply runs out. we will see how highly they regard you then (you will be a sammich)

maybe 20 years ago but its 2019 and the "cool kids" are all online now too

ok good then i was worried. sorry i am doing like 5 different things at once and i scanned the post my bad CALMDEFUCKDOWN

she has a live in boyfriend lol idiot

not trolling but you should see a therapist for some cognitive clean up. i used to be like that but not anymore after i learned some techniques about positive thinking from my therapist. it ended up cutting way way way down on my anxiety, too!! not fully cured... now my thoughts are all of sex, how horny i am, what im going to say next in my sext messages, wondering what MH is doing, bored, bored, bored, thinking about what im eating next, missing madison, unexplained sadness, then my positive affirmations to combat the sadness, bored bored, what can i post next on UEMB lol!

for the 2nd jobby job! she wanted me to start tomorrow but unfortunately i dont work wednesdays for madison's gymnastics (so i can already see i will be constantly reminding folks about my limited schedule) So i start thursday!! YAAYYYYYYYYYY

its not.. now a lego? i threw out all my daughters legos and she was like 5 lol buddyroe says his little boy still plays with them. NO SIREE SIR

nope... i never do this.. wanna borrow an antipsychotic? I have plenty.

our cats constantly poop in any loose dirt madison leaves on the ground after she digs up stuff. the tree we planted? next day the same asshole white cat of ours was pooping under the tree LOL

my daughter reeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllly loves playing the dirt. and i read somewhere that it helps boost their immune system

haha. i like that joke. short and sweet. are you Mr.Girlfriend officially yet? if not when does that happen? if none of my business tell me to go buy Elk poop

i dont smoke weed but i would maybe.. .spend some time... with a guy for $100.. come back!!

it still counts if you peeled the stickers and replaced them, tho, right?

Join us for a Mother's Day Tea in your honor! Advanced payment is required. Call or swing by the gym today to reserve your spot!

I have a friend that burns pallrts in his fire pits regularly

I get that dumb mormon ad all day

unfinished business i have dreams like that a lot.. that im going back.. and then at some point i get sad because i realize the guy im going back to school to see graduated like 20 years ago lol

no switch

He look like a Dad

Midnight is the awkward tryhard of the cool skinny chick all her friends secretly wish she'll move on from or stop bringing around so much I need to get waxed down there. Fresh hoohah and money for waxing is not meeting up for me. Maybe this weekend. Ill call in the appointment.

Not only the mentally ill need to keep good care of their mental health! My therapist tells me a lot that I can't really be a good person, daughter mom whatever if my cup is depleted or half full. I have to make sure im keeping myself happy and doing things for myself as well. Dont let work or relationships with other people drain your emotional cup. Do things that fullfill you and keep you happy. Productive things that give you satisfaction. Positive things. Paint that sunset. Listen to that new album. Cook the healthy meal. Make care packages for the needy. Journal positive affirmations. Forget about what went wrong. Keep track of what went right. How are you blessed? Do small acts of kindness with neighbors and coworkers. Be the light in life! (Most of you are the light and u help me thru a lot. Thanks!)

Youre such a moron