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UnevenEdge

SlappyKincaid

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Everything posted by SlappyKincaid

  1. See, you would think that, and it makes logical sense. ...I plead the 5th
  2. I want that to be my life instead of the lazy chaos I've chosen as my path. And I fail. I didn't listen to yoda. There really is no try, it's do or do not.
  3. I do rack disciprine. I can't even hold all these limes.
  4. how do you still not have a sink? lmao See, I want to try and make that my habit, because I don't often use more than like 2 pots or pans at a time, but I go through dishes and utensils pretty quick. I'm lazy about loading the fucking thing and I'm lazy about unloading it, and everything snowballs until I stress the fuck out about it. Should just burn the place down and start over.
  5. The problem lies when I decide to drink before actually starting to clean. Once I have a buzz, if I'm not already in the process of cleaning, a lot of the time that's when it turns into "crack more open and back to the computer, fuck those nerd plates" ...Actually, that may have helped me figure out one thing I'm doing wrong
  6. I wish I could instill that behavior, but I'm so fucking lazy about cleaning, if I just got better habits, it wouldn't get the point where it looks like a college dorm or a post apocalpyse. And I try for like 3 days and slot back into "fuck it, chuck it in the sink" because I wasn't beaten enough as a child or something.
  7. I try that, problem is then I get drunk and say "fuck it" and do something fun. Meanwhile, the sink is turning into ground zero of "The Last of Us"
  8. I've seen the blue jays be assholes, I never saw the cardinals be jerks at my birdfeeder anyway. I guess it wouldn't be super surprising.
  9. Cleaning was something that was never truly incorporated into my behavior for some reason. Especially for dishes. Why am I so fucking lazy and shitty about it? I even have a fucking dishwasher, I don't even need to do them all by hand anymore... And now I'm here shitposting on my day off after not cleaning the fucking place yesterday like I planned to...
  10. Cereal is too expensive.
  11. I like feeding the birds. Depending on what kinds of birdseed you put out, you get different birds to show up. I like cardinals, chickadees, woodpeckers, and nuthatches myself. Also, the tufted titmouse, because they look cool and have a funny name.
  12. grackles are jerks, though. Sure, they look all iridescent and cool, but they bully other birds and eat baby sparrows
  13. Draw tits on the wall with a crayon
  14. My grandfather told me something once, he said to me "There's an old Italian saying, 'never shit in your hat' " It's good advice, really.
  15. Step one: set the building on fire step two: just kill the batman step three: eat the sun, and get a milky way step four: like a dragonfly, a little fuckin' dragonfly
  16. For my current job, I got a 41, but most of that translates to "my hours are not ideal and I need more money, and am coming off of having literally no money, still" so, grain of salt. But then I re-did it imagining I was still trapped in my previous job, and got a 70. Considering I was on the verge of suicide while at that job, and at times a murder-suicide... And I'm not joking in the slightest about that... Even if it is click-baity, I think it probably is sort of useful to self-diagnose something you've been thinking about a lot but haven't committed to dealing with in any meaningful way.
  17. Ways to track you, I assume. There's probably some database somewhere recording everything, where the information of us available wage slaves is collected, bought and sold. It's called facebook
  18. Only the ones that shoot themselves or get shot by the police after the mass shooting
  19. When I weighed 165, I was but a wee lad in high school. Now I'm like 200ish, down from 230 when I was boozing myself to death.
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