panic

How would you know? You weren't even alive.

My mock was perfect until the Lions took Sewell and then it all went to shit. They just drafted Dillon last year. I wanted them to go after Kylin Hill early on day 3 and they got him in round 7, so I'm pretty excited about that pick. Should be a great third down back. Very similar to Jamal Williams in his ability to run hard inside and pass block, but he also has excellent hands.

Week 1 schedule out.

Only 2 sugar and 60 calories per bar. Good shit.

I'll never forget the Sugar Bowl versus Georgia and the silencing of everyone who thought Hawaii deserved a shot at playing for the national championship. Shit was hilarious.

Drafting a QB whos talent you believe in is always the right decision. The Packers have Aaron Rodgers because of that. Reminds me of this...

"Right before the Packers announced LaFleur as their new head coach, the source close to the team says Murphy called Rodgers to tell him who they were going with. He didn’t ask for permission—he told him who the choice was. There was a brief pause on the other end of the phone before Rodgers eventually spoke. Murphy made it clear that Rodgers would need to accept coaching. 'Don’t be the problem,' he told him. 'Don’t be the problem.' Whoever is to blame, Murphy does not want drama engulfing his team again. The source close to the team says the president is 'tired of the diva stuff.'" Well that worked out.

Packers President Mark Murphy: "This is an issue that we have been working on for several months. Brian Gutekunst, Matt LaFleur and I have flown out on a number of occasions to meet with Aaron. We are very much aware of Aaron's concerns and have been working with him (and his agent Dave Dunn) to resolve them. We remain committed to Aaron in 2021 and beyond. He is not only a tremendously talented player, but has developed into a true leader for us. The relationship that Aaron has forged with Matt and the other offensive coaches has propelled us to the brink of the Super Bowl in two straight years. We look forward to competing for another Super Bowl championship with Aaron as our leader." Hopefully they stick to their guns and trade him when financially feasible and not capitulate and give him the long-term extension.

Yesterday: "I'm not coming back." Today: "I'm not coming back unless you fire the GM." Tomorrow: "I'm not coming back unless you sell me the team." Going to be exciting if they decide to do a post June 1 trade.

Rodgers ain't going anywhere this year. Packers have very little cap space and it would cost them more to trade him than to keep him. Also he ain't retiring to host Jeopardy as that would require him to pay back $30 mil of his signing bonus. Empty threat. No leverage. The dude has played 1 year of his current 4 year extension and already wants another one? Nah. So far today we've been told: 49ers offered #3 overall, more picks and players (including Garappolo). They didn't. Only made a short phone call. Wasn't going to happen pre Lance and ain't happening next year either. Rodgers is upset the Packers didn't take the 49ers deal! The deal that didn't exist? Rodgers to Broncos was as good as done. Didn't happen (could next year). "Rodgers/Wilson/Watson wants out and has all the leverage! A trade is definitely going to happen!" ... And yet, no one is going anywhere. Sports media makes shit up so often and no one ever calls them out. All three will be traded next year and they'll pat themselves on the back for being right even though they were completely fucking wrong.

Looks like Bakemonogatari and is as pretentious as Bakemonogatari, so no surprise that its from Nisio Isin. I had to watch episode 2 just to find out the answer to the mystery before I dropped it, and I haven't been this pissed off at shitty writing since Code Geass. "ITS A SATELLITE... THAT WAS NUKED!" "ARE THEY GOING TO COME AFTER ME? AM I GOING TO DIE? " The next line should have been "Why the fuck would they? Are you fucking nuts?" But instead "DON'T WORRY, PRETTY MIDDLE SCHOOL GENIUSES WILL PROTECT YOU!" What the absolute fuck? Go to fucking class! The only thing you should be protecting is your virginity from Nisio Isin. Spoilers? No, you're welcome. Save your brain cells and watch something with superior dialogue, like Troll 2.

Reboot Junior with @Raptorpat pooping out a baby for 26 hours and call it Patlabor.

It's been done.

Reboot Blade, Teen Wolf, and White Men Can't Jump into one movie where Blade and Teen Wolf team up to dunk on vampires.

A portmanteau of "immortal man" created by spray paint huffing aussies.

36-year-old Greg Olsen? He just retired. Played last season in Seattle. Good landing spot for Kyle Pitts in the draft. Fun fact: Darnold had 11 fumbles in his final college season, most by a first round pick since 2007. The other first round picks with 8+ fumbles in their final college season: Robert Griffin, JaMarcus Russell, Curtis Ponder, Jake Locker, Blake Bortles, and Blaine Gabbert. Good company.

Apparently spending record amounts on mediocre players means you win the offseason.

Mike Evans deserves MVP and an Oscar. Gets a PI on a flop on an uncatchable ball and then a phantom PI on another uncatchable ball.

Who'd Brady pay off to deflate the K-balls?

Cost of drafting and now trading away Goff: FOUR 1sts TWO 2nds THREE 3rds Les Snead is a joke.

Stafford to Rams. Lions get Goff, two 1st round picks (probably 2022 and 2023) and a 3rd round pick. 7 years in a row with no first round pick. No fun to be a Rams fan on draft day.