[classic swim]

Isn’t scared of the Chicago Bears.

Never had the makings of a varsity athlete.

I knew a guy who barged into a crowded Wendy’s lobby just to rub his raw cock up against the counter and made the retiring manager scream all traumatized. And then he rushed the cop inside with a knife and got shot with his penis still hanging out.

One time I went into Don Pablo’s bathroom as a full grown adult and pulled down my pants and shit on the floor and then I picked the turd up and went back out to rub the shit curl against this fucking old guy’s face completely unprovoked.

But I forgot what they ordered.

Well one time I was with my folks and I couldn’t hear what this guy was going to have with his wife. So I walked over to his table and put my face on his face as he was talking to the waiter and tried to jokingly fondle his balls a little bit with his wife watching!

Halo?

Holy shit! Bob the Cucumber’s gone crazy!

This episode and the Clum Babies one fucking ruled.

Puts on a mustache and tippy toes to her house guests like “Zis time I vill not drop ze food!”

Tried putting baked beans in the chili.

Look, we all know Demarco can be a pussy bitch, but how soon will he waddle into the workplace bathroom just so Zaslav can hit him with a hammer and fartfuck dat rusty brown donut against his motherfucking will?

Dressed like Mike Wazowski for Halloween and calls his dog a stupid asshole for letting one fly on the carpet.

Said in 8th grade “why don’t you shut up McDevitt before you get whooped.”

Lit some Chinese firecrackers under the steps as Sal Lizard was rushing down.

Drake Drake Drake Drake Drake Drake Drake I’m 37 years old Drake Drake Drake Drake Drake Drake Drake Drake the best years of my life are behind me and talking about rich chomos gives me fucking oxygen for some reason Drake Drake Drake

Petered out from the wine but good time even with that mess.