Ultima

Remember in HS when you briefly dated a girl and did it with her, but the next day at school she caught you kissing another girl in the hallway and she screamed and cried her eyes out and ran into the ladies bathroom? Fellow studs know the feels. We were so wrong for that. 😓

FTFY

You're being a nerdy otaku and it makes for good comedy.

Why do we have to pronounce it Ko-bee? Why can't we pronounce it Kobe.. Like globe and robe for example. That's how I'm gonna pronounce it from now on because that's the Queen's English.

That was intentionally part of the word play. I can already see the TV commercials for his movie, badass alpha male lines and explosions and the real threat of the world ending caught on tape. Could Generation Z even stomach this? No memes to be made, gotta beg their parents to take them since it'll be rated X and such

Zenigundam because he knows what constitutes badassery and would never put any romantic or comedic elements into a CO-VID19 movie, but I can understand if he wasn't included on the bump because he operates behind the scenes. His movie would be so sick, the perfect action horror flick

My friend CAN handle the situation, he's just not in the mood for it. Why fix a 33 year old woman's self-inflicted problems when he can save a sexy, 18 year old maiden from any problems? 👫 ... Or so he tells me. This man makes so much sense. The ladies of his generation must have been smoking some serious skunk to blow him off! 🤦🏻‍♂️

He just read through her Wikipedia page. He doesn't wanna fix her. She's older than he is!!! What do you take him for?! 😡 (He texted me that smiley to relay to you)

He'll try his best to fix her. He just saw your post. 😓🙏🍿

My friend is a Chad, but he hates every woman to ever appear on any season of The Bachelor, and any woman who acts like that in real life, and he's still never heard of this lady. I don't know if he can fix her. He's impregnable, but she very well might be damaged. And he needs to know more about her motives and such because she just might be a typical YouTuber/social media child and not a real badass woman.

I've never seen that show, but I don't have to pump fake or hype up my man, ZG. All I know is that I asked a lot of people (who know him better than I do) if they'd rely on him to survive a bar fight and save his woman, and they were confidently saying that he could and they were mentioning him with Jon Jones and Stipe Miocic and such. I'm still writing my thesis on this guy, but I'm just saying what those close to him have reiterated to me, and there's supposedly videos of him crushing his punching bag in his garage that let it be known that he is, in fact, a monster. This is all so exciting and frightening to me at the same time as I continue to conduct my research on him. 😲🙀💪🍿🇺🇸

I actually have this intuitive feeling that it's quite diminutive. I've heard from some of my best friend's female partners that his spoon is massive. Bigger than a tablespoon if you can even imagine that And what does he do with that Superspoon of his, you ask? He dominates. He wins the game. 💪😾💆

I'm rather slender, but my friend slimmed down to 175 of sturdy muscle. Enough to knock most of these betas on their asses and rock any hot maiden's world. 🔥 When I grow up, I wanna be just like him because he just takes things over. It's soooooo cool. He's like a real life Frank Castle.

He's a stud. I can't wait for him to get his chance next May. He's been sitting back and waiting for far too long... It's time for him to shove these predictable frauds aside and seize the moment and win the grand prize. 👫

I guarantee I can make anything that was considered expensive and luxurious from any time up until maybe the 70s on a $50 budget. I'm that dude... Well not as much as my good friend, but I've learned a lot from him about survival of the fittest and alpha energy.

He immortalized himself. Nobody cares about who had what, especially back in those wack ass times. 😸

I've never heard of her. Is she around 18 and sexy? My friend is a law-abiding citizen who greatly appreciates purity and beauty. 🇺🇸 Those older women had their chances... 😡... Is what he just texted me. 🏃

Generation Z hopefully

I know what ya mean. My friend is a master of self isolation and he texted me that he's been hearing voices in his head lately.

Why is it that it used to be cool for my friend to try his luck with these beautiful, young women and now you guys are doing a 180 on him? 👎

I'm surprised he figured this out. I was starting to think that all girls want affectionate, emotional, "charming", non-combative beta males. This just might be the greatest discovery since that British dude found King Tut's tomb.

My friend figured out how to win the Stacys and he tells me it has nothing to do with being a soft, affectionate beta who uses girly charm and passive body language. There's a way to be rugged and aggressive and win, but he hasn't told me the secret to winning the prizes just yet. He only tells me that there's a way and that winning is invigorating.

He was cool, he was a red dog and he used to post on the internet. Is that man allowed on this site? He has his other homies who want to sign up and are also my friend's friends, but they haven't been around lately.

you know in Fire Emblem: Three Houses how the surviving males and females in your party get married after you beat the game? That's weird because in some of my playthroughs someone like Ingrid, who is 16/17, when the game starts has ended up getting married to a dude in his 40s like Seteth at the end of the game when she's 21, so that means he's crushing on a teenage student at the academy he teaches at in the first half of the game. 🤢