jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Posted October 10, 2019 Was gonna go to the gym again with a friend Tuesday night. But she was hungry and wanted to grab a bite, and we ran into more classmates at a bar. This time a lot of the group was comprised of my mentors though. I told her I rather hang out with them than go to the gym, but she was down to hang out. I immediately start drinking with them and then later getting high with them. OmG like everyone here does, I swear it just really is that stressful here than every just takes thc. Ok so like, I'm not really here to catch feelings, but last week during my shitty midterm, I was caught crying waiting for my bus by one of my mentors. He is a stem major and he said that like he was will to tutor me if I need help and honestly that was like a really weird thing to hear I after I made that thread talking about how desperate I was to do well in my math class. >__> Plus I always freak out when people are nice to me, it's weird I'm used to people treating me like trash. <__< And he did actually try to help me with the midterm but there were some concepts he was unfamiliar with that they don't always teach in all calc classes that they made us learn here. lol And he is hot, but like the really irritating hot that's just so unnecessary and distracting. Like I'm here to learn. lol Anyways everyone wanted to see the new Joker movie, and I was down to go, so like 6 of us pile in a small 5 person car to the theatre. lol I forgot my bank card at the bar (it's still there lol) and I venmo someone money to pay for my ticket. While waiting out side before the show, I'm smoking cigarettes with my mentor and he start talking about comic books. And of course, this man is being so nice and generous, that for some god damn reason I feel the need to brag how I know more about comic than most people. 😆 When we walk into the theater, he sees that they have those bars and ordered me another drink with 2 shots. lol My group was being ghetto and talking through the movie lol. What made this day different? No one tried to grab me and I was even dropped off to my dorm at the end of the night. Anyways, why say all this? Because I don't know what the fuck I am doing lol wat would u do? I'm going to an edm concert tomorrow and he is driving me there, gonna meet another person from over there. Wat do, how do I be normal. 3
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 2 minutes ago, scoobdog said: You sound overwhelmed by fun. More like overwhelmed by talking to a ton of people and constantly wondering if I am acting weird or wondering if they are judging me. lol 1
scoobdog Posted October 10, 2019 Posted October 10, 2019 You don't sound weird, even when you describe it yourself. It just sounds like the hanging out thing is a lot to process, as it would be for anyone.
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 4 minutes ago, scoobdog said: You don't sound weird, even when you describe it yourself. It just sounds like the hanging out thing is a lot to process, as it would be for anyone. 3 minutes ago, scoobdog said: Hope you locked your bank card, though. Well I'm not being specific. I'm too insecure though, that is true and I still don't know how to deal with that. lol I've been monitoring it, there is no purchases on it. I haven't picked it up yesterday because there are city wide planned black outs happening in Berkeley and I think that business is closed but was planning getting it today. I left it at the tab area. 1
Lytbryt Posted October 10, 2019 Posted October 10, 2019 Your friends sound boring wanna Netflick and chilll 1
Lasty Posted October 10, 2019 Posted October 10, 2019 You already are normal. Most people have some kind of social anxiety if you dig deep enough. Just be yourself! If you want to like people as much as you want to be liked, they’ll see that. They already have or they wouldn’t be inviting you along. ^___^ 1
Doom Metal Alchemist Posted October 10, 2019 Posted October 10, 2019 After being a shut-in that only leaves the house for school for pretty much my whole adulthood, I've been in a couple bands since 2016, I got a job slightly over a year ago and am still with the company, and a couple or so months ago I joined a D&D group. Lately I've been going to a lot of concerts by myself, but on black Friday me and a friend are carpooling to San Francisco to see one. Being social is fun as long as it's with the right people. 1
Poof Posted October 10, 2019 Posted October 10, 2019 It never occurs to me that you'd be so antisocial that any of this would even be a big deal. You come off very normal you know. It should be easy as long as you show up!
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 1 hour ago, scoobdog said: Fucking PG&E. Well the students are happy school is cancelled for 2 days.
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 1 hour ago, Lytbryt said: Your friends sound boring wanna Netflick and chilll Well I already bought tickets but maybe next time. 😁
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 48 minutes ago, Lasty said: You already are normal. Most people have some kind of social anxiety if you dig deep enough. Just be yourself! If you want to like people as much as you want to be liked, they’ll see that. They already have or they wouldn’t be inviting you along. ^___^ Hopefully everything goes smooth. 😅
RainyDayJizz#35 Posted October 10, 2019 Posted October 10, 2019 This is one a lot of people have trouble with. The trick to it is that you need to exist. After that everything is fine.
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 48 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said: After being a shut-in that only leaves the house for school for pretty much my whole adulthood, I've been in a couple bands since 2016, I got a job slightly over a year ago and am still with the company, and a couple or so months ago I joined a D&D group. Lately I've been going to a lot of concerts by myself, but on black Friday me and a friend are carpooling to San Francisco to see one. Being social is fun as long as it's with the right people. I think I’m just so scared cause I used to have best friends to hang out with but someone else in my life at the time decided to get involved and now I don’t have any in person really anymore. 1
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 22 minutes ago, Poof said: It never occurs to me that you'd be so antisocial that any of this would even be a big deal. You come off very normal you know. It should be easy as long as you show up! Well a lot of social activities scare the shit out of me even though I can run my mouth for awhile. 😅 I was bullied a lot as a kid, school and home and I’m constantly afraid of being made fun of again. Plus I haven’t maintained relationships since then. I just constantly find myself alone. 1
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 7 minutes ago, GreatBallsOfJizz said: This is one a lot of people have trouble with. The trick to it is that you need to exist. After that everything is fine. But what if my heart is going ba THUMP over and over
Lasty Posted October 10, 2019 Posted October 10, 2019 11 minutes ago, jackiemarie90 said: Hopefully everything goes smooth. 😅 And hey- if it doesn’t? Learning experience! HA. It’s always smooth...
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 4 minutes ago, Lasty said: And hey- if it doesn’t? Learning experience! HA. It’s always smooth... Yeah I just got avoid the guy who I sit next to for the rest of semester, and maybe next because we are planning on taking the same class. 😆
RainyDayJizz#35 Posted October 10, 2019 Posted October 10, 2019 5 minutes ago, jackiemarie90 said: But what if my heart is going ba THUMP over and over Happens to everybody sometimes. It's supposed to go away after a bit.
jackiemarie90 Posted October 10, 2019 Author Posted October 10, 2019 10 minutes ago, GreatBallsOfJizz said: Happens to everybody sometimes. It's supposed to go away after a bit. I don’t like it 😩
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