discolé monade

will only accept chocolate chip cookies with an odd number of chips above 11

is the one that fooled mother nature. (iykyk)

knows damn well that is every pack of fruitstripe gum.

knows at least 436 tricks with doublemint gum and it's wrappers.

knows damn well, he perfected the pacterd toaster chop.

follows behind me, wearing a top hat, shouting "MERRY BIRTHYEAR!!"

backpacked through the english countryside, only to be attacked by a werewolf in a deserted plot of land.

also likes to pretend he owns a jail cell in the middle of the atlantic ocean.

every item he has, that requires a password, he uses supercalafragilisticexpialadoscious123!

likes to film people attempting to parallel park.

makes yukeleles. bio-degradeable yukeleles.

has been taking notes this entire time for sick burns and quick comebacks at work.

i actually do. pink lady bic. i will say this. those harry's razors are really REALLY good.

doesn't care what ANYone says, he KNOWS he looks GOOOOOOD in them daisy dukes!

pays the ferris wheel guy to make it stop at the bottom.

learned about glory holes in a porta potty at the county fair.

is a taylor swift groupie. a 'swiftie' , if you would.

owes colombia house $178.92

has been removed from several shoney's for attempting to do the 'pull the tablecloth' trick.

has tried out several times for 'lego masters', unfortunately, he keeps getting denied, as, per the letter of denial: 'on LEGO masters, LEGO brand LEGO's are being used. DUPLO is not the brick of choice for this event. thank you for your 7th inquiry'.

was the one that brought back the 'card girl' for the ring. he wore a lovely chiffon number with blue sequence.

attempted to cut a weed supply with black market potatoes. an actual success, since burning it made it smell like pototo chips.

gets paid by carrot top to compliment his new look.

knows what peanut does behind closed door with mr. hoonie.

made another ham, trying an idea. i used inglehoffer instead of plain yellow, between teh fat and meat, with bits of pineapple. on a bed of pineapples, with an outer rub of brown sugar and honey. cold slaw? cole slaw? out of the garden cabbage. yum. i had no carrots though. shame. seared brussels sprouts in a balsamic and honey reduction. and twiced baked po'tay'toe