Codename: Jackass

Oh shit it's Rainteacher again.

This one time I had a horrible sunburn as a child and my mom put some vinegar on my back because it was an old school remedy she used. The itch was unbelievable. It was all permeating, I went into the shower and tried to wash it off but it just kept itching, I was crying because of how intense it was, rubbing my bare sunburned back against the wall. Eventually it stopped. I couldn't verbalize it then, but I probably would have killed myself if it had kept going.

Marijuana is for losers.

You know.

You've built being a functional member of society up into something it isn't and you let people tell you that work=suicide because to them having their co-dependent little pity party is more important.

Masturbate until your penis falls off and never leave the house.

Sorry dude, when I take my Seroquel you can't account for what I might do. Been on any good dumpster dives lately, Nab?

It's NaBraniel.

I picked up one day after about six months of off and on calls and said "listen, I'm not Charla Handin, don't fucking call me." The calls continued another six months.

Who's getting the ol' snip first?

Oh well. Sort of like a benign skin tumor or that weird cyst I have on my wrist.

No Drink Rest of Decade starts now.

I used to get bill collector calls for someone I didn't know (I'd had this number for four years by that point so I don't know why they were calling my phone) and they'd call once a day every day for weeks on end. Eventually they just stopped.

I'm on day 4. Let's do it.

tfw ur a genius

You'll be back posting daily in less than a week.

If you're looking for me, you'd better check under the sea.

It was me. I have some rubber duckies that Quackers may be interested in.

There's this 9% ABV beer only available in TX that I love.

This was an eloquent eulogy.

Good day young man

I stole it from some guy who posts corny jokes on another message board.

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