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UnevenEdge

[classic swim]

SwimStar
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Everything posted by [classic swim]

  1. When ever Guster was done pepper spraying his face along the house, he convinced her to get Raptorpat to break into my house and taser me in my bitch ass sleep.
  2. Dressed up as Shoney’s Bear to try to appeal Hoonie name change. She just constantly chased him around the house to try and pepper spray him.
  3. Got a hooker for Mr. Hoonie that’d be willing to sniff his cheesy pete’s.
  4. Got in a heated argument with GunStar and she was like “alright that does it, ghostrek’s name has now been legally changed to Mr. Hoonie.” So it’s all his fault.
  5. Henry Tomasino made me think they were going for Suspicion by Cary Grant and pussed out more than halfway. I’d never change the death since it’s a fairly historic horror scene. Vávra’s scrapped plan on clearing Henry’s name would only work if there was true clarity on who he even was. The Mussolini line in chapter 5’s such a deep cut that they failed to deliver on.
  6. Can fly higher than an eagle when no bitches make him fuck up and go up the stairs.
  7. Stops some guy who’s rubbing his butthole outside of Kroger and is like “aye man, you know classic swim is gonna be out here playin with ya buttcheeks, so why don’t ya work where I work at, over at the GhoopaBitch gummy bear factory...” That’s how he got a new reference.
  8. He sneezes on people’s backs at self checkout.
  9. There’s a low quality, Thunderf00t sounding british rant on Simpsons Skateboarding for PlayStation that I remember so vividly but know it’s been lost to time. ”The gods of gaming have abandunnd me.” *Begins video with skit jumping off cliff* ”quick, let’s make a shittehh Tonie Hocck rippof and shittet out for those stewwpid kids to play. I mean, how could they fuckit up so bodd?”
  10. Walks out the work bathroom after turning the light off and making dudes with shitty butts mad.
  11. He fought tooth and nail with himself multiple times that simplistic cartoon genitals played for comedy should stain your soul instead of it being a who-gives-a-fuck situation. He was only being hyperbolic for that reason.
  12. Turns into a cocky talking mule deer when a talking hillbilly fish grandma underwater calls to scream at him and call him names as she throws the fish phone against her Section 8 house underwater.
  13. Was the one to suggest we go back and edit the rap name to Explosionons. We sold 22 more records from that advice.
  14. Made 25 cents telling Papa Smurf to go live inside Rebecca’s pussy.
  15. You’d offend a lot of people.
  16. Turned into John Wick because someone called his dog a choofus.
  17. Instead of being punished, he’s rewarded with The Seight Song.
  18. He says a nice way to alleviate anxiety is to grease the ferret. He gets his pet ferret to jump in a miniature tub of chicken grease.
  19. Seight’s favorite midnight snack is the snack that smiles back. Goldfish!
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