Sieg67

I find that hair...apeeling.

More like a cheapass thing to say. I always try to fix stuff myself to save a bit of cash.

Dryers are very fixable. Probably no need for a whole new one.

Take him to a movie?

I didn't know they were actually a thing until a couple of years ago. I read that cases have gone up 500%. Check your shit people. Catch them while they're few in numbers.

How is it broken? Not heating? Not spinning? Both not heating or spinning?

They ruined my wallet.

Those are fun. I learned the best way to deal with individual ones is by spaying them with alcohol. Stronger the better. It's a lot less messy than smashing them. A number of things would work but alcohol doesn't stain and dries quickly. Also keeping it in a spray bottle makes it easier to apply to cuts. I think my bug problem taking care of now. At least I hope so.

My boss started off as cool but now I just see her as a lazy hypocrite.

"I have aids!"

YOU DARE MOCK THE GREAT SAIYAN PRINCE?! You would think that he'd realize that prince thing doesn't mean anything anymore.

Pepperidge Farm remembers.

I saw the video of the first one. They punched each other.

That's a gif. I can't put that in a newspaper. You're fired.

That's a terrible idea. You're fired.

You have to hang out with your family.

I could only wish to be a kawaii as Petelgeuse.

People will go crazy over that masked menace.

Don't go if you don't want to. Tradition is a shit reason to do anything.

Depends. You could get turkey powers if it's radioactive.

Donald Trump.

I have a joke about fish, but it'll probably flop. I also have one about hipsters, but you probably never heard of it.

Oh boy I totally didn't see that coming.

I thought all of us were creeps.