Drunkenwarrior

Coz i like ya

Fuck you think this is? Reading Rainbow?

I know, too bad we don't have any asian markets around me

I bet that marshall sounds exactly like sam elliot

What was your childhood like man?

I stand up like a horse and just shit where I like, the way nature intended

This fucking thread was a roller coaster and a half....bravo

You're doing it wrong

You're obviously not eating at the right shit hole

For the amount of food you get, americans need to get their shit together

I'm gonna bring down the apompalypse

How do you even know what my junk looks like?

That's not nearly as messy as I had hoped

Here's a list of chuck norris' favorite foods: Whisky

I always thought thought she liked kinda trashy myself..... But she got nice tits

One time, Chuck Norris read a news piece about some guy who was given a death penalty for treason. Treason is especially offensive to Chuck because he embodies everything that is, was, or ever will be American. Chuck Norris loves America so much that when he gets interrupted during sex, he gets red, white and blue balls. So when Chuck read about this traitor, he killed himself, went to hell and ripped the guy's face off and uses it as a loincloth to this day. Chuck then resurrected himself, went to lunch, and paid for his food with exact change.

Chuck Norris starts his day like every red-blooded man: with a giant boner. After rubbing one off, Chuck flosses his teeth with steel wool. Thean he east a bowl of dynamite, takes a massive two-flush megashit, and wipes his ass with intercepted letters to Santa Clause

In the evening, Chuck Norris likes to sit in the dark and silently pray that his enemies get cancer

One time Chuck Norris was walking around in the forest, looking for hippies to use as firewood, when a wild boar suddenly crossed his path. Big mistake. Chuck lifted the boar into the air with his mind, spun him around and digested him telekineticly, chuck wasn't even hungry.

It's a conspiracy brah...they want you to be unhappy

I forgot how crazy you are

Well a lot of people are wrong

Do people not like that?

I kinda like creed too, not gonna lie. it's a bit nostalgic