Codename: Jackass

The one thing I dread about fall is how everyone and their dog is posting blog posts about "muh pumpkin spice amazeballs". Kill me.

Good to see Atlantic City has managed to out-sleaze the Donnie.

Yeah but there are a lot of bugs in my backyard.

Yeah but sometimes I want to choose whether or not to lay down.

I find this concept of "blogging" to be a strangely human phenomenon. I must conduct more research so I may understand its significance.

Just find one that licenses his name then, they'll get the message.

Damn, damn, damn.

No, I've had about 18oz of beer in the past hour. I'm just thinking about how bad it would be to have uncontrollable falling down.

Thanks for reading my blog.

Crickets chirpin', breeze breezin', cat purrin'.

Smear shit on the walls of the Trump one. Or did that one close already?

One night I dreamed that I stole a drill gun from the scene shop at my old university and my boss was really pissed off and they sent the University PD after me and I was trying to run away but kept falling down over and over and couldn't stop hitting the trigger on the drill.

Fuck, man.

Nice, dude.

He's be a lot more fun to have around if he'd just chill the fuck out and stop letting people bother him so bad. He needs actual therapy instead of just toking up all the time, it's not healthy.

Phillies has probably shamefully jacked it to futa more than once.

Reported

Plot twist: the Smoke Monster from Lost makes an appearance. Written by Damon Lindelof.

Most people at Walmart need to sit down to piss anyway because they can't find their genitals due to being amorphous blobs.

It was 80 degrees at 7:00pm here.

I like Furryfox because of all the extensions.

Global warming doesn't real you stupids

They're in Dallas, nowhere close.

The record for total rainfall produced by one tropical cyclone in the US was broken.