PokeNirvash

WARNING: high impact sexual violence awaits you.

...Oh. Apparently this is what I get for putting someone on my ignore list. That said, the skiing edit I saw on 4chan is a much better use of that image.

Nobody fucking cares, Zeni.

The attack of the killer track continues.

Tonight on Toonami, the remaining competitors serious up following the immediate deletion of the 9th Universe, Sarada tries to learn about her infamous father through a visit to her local library, an innocent trip to the mall turns harrowing for Deku when he comes into contact with Shigaraki of the League of Villains, Kirito tries his hand at chopping down a big-ass tree with a sword (because why wouldn't he?), Joe and Mikio fight for the final Megalonia slot and for realsies this time, Reverb's new power upgrade forces Kira to return to the scene of the crime and succeed where Heart Attack is failing, the Midnight Sun once again ruins the Black Bulls' latest attempt at a regular arc with another surprise attack, the TV content rating should tell you all you need to know about what happens between Gon and Pitou this week, Sai reminisces of what little time he's spent with Naruto and Sakura thus far, and never expect good things to happen when the normally-shortened ending theme plays in full. 11:00 - Dragonball Super #99 - Show Them! Krillin's Underlying Strength!! - TV-14L 11:30 - Boruto: Naruto Next Generations #19 - Sarada Uchiha - TV-PGL 12:00 - My Hero Academia #38 - Encounter - TV-14V 12:30 - Sword Art Online: Alicization #3 - The End Mountains - TV-PGV 1:00 - Megalobox #9 - A Dead Flower Shall Never Bloom - TV-14L 1:30 - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Diamond is Unbreakable #24 - Sheer Heart Attack, Part 2 - TV-MAV 2:00 - Black Clover #58 - The Battlefield Decision - TV-PG 2:30 - Hunter x Hunter #131 - Anger and Light - TV-MAV (!!!) 3:00 - Naruto Shippuden #238 - Sai's Day Off - TV-PG 3:30 - Attack on Titan #49 - Night of the Battle to Retake the Wall - TV-14LV By the way, I'm staying up for all the shows again, so if you want my comments on various things, check out the episode discussion threads, where I provide a lighter and more insightful alternative to the constant complaints and stupid questions that normally populate its contents. [welcome to the runway of death]

[sees comment and number of likes] I don't get it.

Racist Deku is pretty hilarious, if you aren't triggered by Trump jokes.

Or maybe people just like themselves some Tenten.

I actually remember reading about that, but the whole "new teacher" thing is news to me.

Seraphiiiiiiiiiim~. [best worst girl ever]

Which would explain their portrayal as such in Hellsing Ultimate Abridged.

Magical Girl Site, just so we can hear about Demarco's reaction when it's inevitably rejected.

Do you not get that advertising April Fool's stunts ruins the idea of there being one to begin with? Hence why 2016 advertised one that wasn't there. That was the prank in itself.

DT Eightron 3

My only protest with your megapost is that Jamie Marchi seems more likely to be the blower of the Horn of SJWs (trademark) and the leader of a cabal of evil witch feminists (at least in the Black Clover dub, for sure) than Monica Rial.

Toldja going neutral wasn't a bad idea.

At this point, I'm not sure which side to believe.

Apparently, I said. On that note, #KickVic or #IStandWithVic, fake calls to SWAT are not okay. That's... kind of extreme.

What's the point of posting a link to something I can't see? But yeah, no wonder [as] makes fun of us at every opportunity, we're apparently nutjobs.

Lazzo's an idiot and Demarco's a tool, clearly Gill should be in charge.

DRAGONBALL SUPER - Again, this dumbass knows that there's no Otherworld after getting erased from existence, right? Shut up, 9th Kai. Extremely sore, in fact. It's a little something we like to call "conserving your energy", Supreme Kai. Goku thinking strategically, I bet you anything HFIL's frozen over by now. Oh, so that was what they were called. Beerus sounded awfully un-Beerus-like in the voice there. Around furries, never relax! So much for your flight advantage boi. Careful, Frieza, you'll get a red card if you toy with him too hard for too long. Shut up, 9th Kai. PRIMARY COLOR TRIANGLE OF DANGER. Vegeta punches first, and asks questions later. "You think this is a game!?" It's Goku, it might as well be a game, as far as he's concerned. That cat lady is giving me feelings. I am so sick of this woman's sarcastic laughter. There ain't no cheating in a street fight, Goku. I'm surprised that the Elder Kai is even capable of throwing shade at his old age. SO MANY FEELINGS. Keep throwing that shade, Elder Kai, that asshole deserves it. Okay, I kinda want most of these furries die now. Champa don't know shit about Frieza do he? Beerus is coming this close to choking the life out of 9th Kai, and I wouldn't blame him for doing so. Punch him with your ice arm! Finally, someone thought to duck. See, the ice arm is a good punching implement. Thank you for the recap, Blue Dandy. As I thought, rabbit girl did jack shit. When faced with Frieza, the smartest thing to do is run, even if doing so is equally boneheaded. Welp, can't say they didn't have that coming. Welp, y'all are screwed. THEY ACTUALLY DID IT, THE ABSOLUTE MADPEOPLE. Now their Angel can smoke pot in peace. I dunno, I'd call a tattoo artist who refers to himself as "the tattoo artist" as if him being the best is common knowledge, and tattooing without the need for drawing it first as if he's super-skilled at it, to be more than "just OK". BORUTO: NARUTO NEXT GENERATIONS - Naruto getting wasted, oh how he's grown. Everyone but Rock Lee and Shino are some degree of drunk. Shino knows Kiba only claimed he wanted to be Hokage that one time to get under Naruto's skin. ATOMIC BUTT-DROP. She's going to die doing that job one of these days. Even as Hokage, Kakashi got the short end of the stick. Finally, they acknowledge that Shikamaru took up smoking. Don't you just hate bickering between siblings? BYAKUGAN ACTIVATED. Poked him so hard, even the Nine-Tails felt it. If you're wondering why Gai's in a wheelchair, read the manga. NARUTO IS DED. Remind me never to mess with this child. Clearly he wants to avoid getting stomach-poked to death again. Oh hey, is that the panda from Polar Bear's Cafe? Oh, so he is capable of using shadow clones to do his work. FOOD FIGHT! But not in that way. Welp, time for some father-son bonding time. The ultimate rite of passage: the first visit to Ichiraku. And it's got windows too, good for them! Nice poster. I assume her loving Ichiraku is just a natural extension of her Naruto fetish. Boruto is so tsundere for ninja flicks. NEW SPOILER: Chojuro, Kurotsuchi and Darui are now the Mizukage, Tsuchikage and Raikage, respectively. Not bad for bodyguards. He's not fat, he's just chubby. Boruto is also tsundere for his father. It's thanks to that ramen episode of Dandy that I drink the remaining broth straight from the bowl whenever I have Asian soups. Hey, remember when those two were relevant. DOUBLE KNOCK-OUT. Hinata has extremely good metabolism. What's important is, the stuffed animal was fixed. Apparently it's just now that my dad found out what's been happening in Boruto. MY HERO ACADEMIA - I spent Thursday night, Friday morning, and a good half of Saturday reading MHA crackfics, so actually watching the genuine article may be a little awkward. And already, I prefer fanfic Bakugo to the canon article. Oh hey, I remember this clip from the Cartoon Cipher's guide to ADR. He's following you because you're supposed to be working together in this. That boy ain't right. Maaaaaan, fuck canon Bakugo. You see? You see what happens when you spend less time strategizing and more time arguing? All Might is naturally intimidating, that's why villains fear him as the Dreaded. Yessssss kick his ass All Might. To be fair, Bakugo deserves to be left behind. Now if only his personality was as good as his fighting skills. All Might beating up Bakugo makes me happy inside. [gasp] La creatura... "You may be a jerk... But you're my jerk..." I swear, it's like this boy's refusing character development on purpose. AHHHHHHH DEKU PUNCHED HIM YOU DON'T KNOW HOW EXCITED I AM THAT THAT HAPPENED. And then brave Sir Deku ran away~. God Bakugo is a terrible human being. Oh wow they're actually working together who saw that coming. Unlike you, Bakugo had plenty of time to train his arms to handle it, just be glad you didn't break any bones. Yeah, their feelings are complicated all right. Thanks for letting us know this was a paid ad, now Toonami General has a reason to get mad when asked why by the non-4channers. It's so good to see them getting along, even if it's still somewhat contentious. NOBODY EXPECTS ALL MIGHT. It's not that he's got the power, it's that he is the power. At this point, I'm fully convinced him telling people to die is just hyperbole (except when he means it). FUN FACT: Assy McGee is the only Western animated show to my knowledge that takes place in New Hampshire. BACKBREAKER! And into the bus. I still love watching All Might toss Bakugo around like a rag doll. You haven't truly lived as an anime character until you've punched your father figure in the face. It's all about those rescue points. And penultimate bookending, apparently. Dang, after the crackfic from last night I can't not view Ochaco and Tsuyu as a couple. REPLY TO ANGEL 1: "He's wearing 300 pound weights and only has one lung but still damn near crippled them for life." Both lungs but no stomach, actually. (Unless that was some obscure reference...) It wasn't a One for All-related injury, so it's within her right to heal. Bakugo unconscious for an indefinite amount of time? GOOD. Wow, they ended one episode earlier than I anticipated. Still, with 16 wins and 4 losses, that ain't a bad track record. Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom League of Villains... You've got a lotta nerve calling anything gross while looking like that, dude. AND THERE'S MURDER WAIFU NUMBER FOUR. SWORD ART ONLINE ALICIZATION - Welcome to purgatory, Kirito. Nope, still registers as St. Louis to me. "Mmm, that's some good virtual water." You know things are bad when you start having nostalgia for things you don't remember. Oh hey it's that one movie girl, does that mean I have to watch Ordinal Scale anytime soon? Huh, looks like we've graduated to English replacing Japanese on the episode titles, then. You really need to stop grabbing for invisible swords, Kirito. A lost child of what now? Clearly a rural legend. It's a fantasy world, so "log out" being slang could make sense, even though you know dang well it doesn't. "Sir"? Rock bread. It's purgatory, Kirito, deal with it. Don't give the poor kid accidental Nam flashbacks. Friendly reminder that Integrity Knights are bigger dicks than Bakugo on a bad day. Yeah, no way they'd execute a child over a few fingertips over the line in the medieval era, no way... DIALOGUE BETWEEN DAD AND I: "The Taboo Index?" "This show has way too many proper nouns." Let me axe you a question... I could feel my eyes burning watching that interstital. Even Kirito thinks this is ridiculous. Two-thousand yen says Kirito fells it in one swoop. Your Gary Stu powers won't work here, Kirito mah boi. Maybe next time try aiming for the huge cut that's already there. OH MY GAWD. You village people trust your book of Da Rules too much. And now my dad called him "Yugioh" even though his name isn't pronounced with a hard G. This dude's a total Bakugo. You had Kirito's curiosity before, puratory, now you have his attention. Welcome to the Church, no Astas allowed. There's only one St. Louis, unless you count St. Louis County. You heard it here first, Akihiko Kayaba kills babies. It ain't SAO without gratuitous waifubait fanservice. REPLY TO ANGEL 2: "I'm already dreading the looming gratuitous rape scene." You should. MEGALOBOX - Joe's pissed that Kirito postponed his show last week, and Mikio blackmailing him may have had something to do with it. It ain't a kid's game, yeah, but it ain't no Tournament of Power either. Fuck yeah, armchair detective work. That was some pretty obvious Recycled Animation no Jutsu there. "What's this sassy lost child doing here?" Fujimaki must be wondering. Ohhhhhhhh that kid just cursed. SHIT COUNT: 1. No one ever expects loan sharks. So is Nanbu the good cop or the bad cop in this situation? Even the dog hates Mikio. If there's someone who knows their animal metaphors, it's Yuri. PAPARAZZI GO HOME. This was what IGPX was missing, a jealous sibling on the managerial side. >_> I'm guessing he just accidentally revealed he was cheating. I'm not sure if this commercial is better or worse than the blowhorn version. You heard it here first, Mikio's a dirty coward. "Your enemy's enemy's a friend" is a way better way of putting it than "Enemy Mine". DIS BITCH. There goes my dad in the other room again, mistaking "Yuri" for "urine". Dirty looks run in their family, it appears. Nanbu you madman. DIS BITCH. It's no use, you'll have to escape through the air ducts. And off goes Joe to play the Big Damn Hero. Shut the fuck up, Mikio. This is the best possible outcome. I've missed this show, and it's only been gone for two weeks. "Mind if I root through your trash?" It's fine if it's you who's doing it, talking bear. JOJO'S BIZARRE ADVENTURE: DIAMOND IS UNBREAKABLE - HERE'S YOUR KILLER TRACK BABY! Koichi, you could really kill to scream less often, it actually rivals the female victims in horror movies in how annoyingly often you let them out when shit goes crazy. Jotaro's gotten smart about this, perhaps too smart... That's the Joestar family for you, scary good at playing armchair detective. He and his buddies were pursued on end by DIO's minions for months, this is a regular level of caution as far as he's concerned. SCRUTINIZE EVERYTHING. Goddammit Koichi. Well, at least it's off Koichi. Now that's what I call an invincible STAND. OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW. Go long! Believe in your own self-preservation, Koichi. You've seen him, tell Jotaro he's blonde, that should help in his investigation should it continue. VERTIGO. I love that he's even picked up DIO's ways of announcing a time-stop. Well... shit. JOTARO IS DED. Check his pulse, Koichi! I've got an idea, turn on the hot water and just let it run, it'll steam eventually. Koichi's hairstyle's changing, that means shit's gonna get real. How savage of you, Koichi. What a smart distraction. The plot is what's going on, Josuke. One has to wonder why he hasn't just turned off the stove yet. MY BACK! REVERB IS DED. Dammit Koichi, he's probably just molting again. His STAND is now a robot with attitude that can teleport. That's pretty metal. Geriatric turtles. I think I heard that joke in Pop Team Epic once. S-H-I-T outta luck. (Does that count for the shit count?) 100 times gravity: activated. It's fun watching Kira suffer. Great, now the waiter thinks he's in a yaoi doujin. SHIT COUNT: 5. BLACK CLOVER - And that's how the situation went without the contextual flashbacks. The Queen's magic may help, but the Queen herself is a different story. Finral's boner doesn't care whether they're witches or not. "Yare yare..." There's that screaming boner Angel was going on about. Beefier legs than a Santa Tsuji girl. The "W" stands for "Wumbo", let's leave it at that. I don't even need any additional context to know they're shit-talking Sekke. That voice does not fit her, I'm sorry. I have a gut feeling talking about imperfection is gonna be her one-note running gag, like Vetto's despair or Gauche's sister. Not even when he's whispering can Asta tone it down. Neat, an invisibility cloak (sorta). "Don't be stupid; you will buy this product." Nobody tells Asta nothin'. As they say, it's not a true Black Clover story arc without the Midnight Sun getting involved in one way or another. YANDERE EYES. Say what you will about this place, but I like the variety of their outfit colors. Sekke's a true urban legend in these parts. Gender segregation, go? REPLY TO ANGEL 3: "Why is Asta even wrapped in the blanket he has no magic." Yes, but he's still physically visible without it. Who in their right mind would sell love potions at what's obviously a produce stand? [pushes the Easy Button] At least his underwear stayed on this time. NAUGHTY. Glad to see someone thought to dodge those fireballs. Oh god, he even has business cards. And in pseudo-English, no less! "Crap, we're surrounded! Again." LUCKY SMOKESCREEN. Can't patch what's just been recently damaged, at least not right away. Below-average landing, 3/10. The Witch Queen's ability to get around makes Charles zi Britannia's lawlharem conquests look like a joke. CAW CAW MOTHERFUCKER. Such inconsistent animation quality. Even if that image in your crystal ball is legit, I don't see any blood so clearly you're planning on going easy on them. Ruining the plot since last winter, that's the Eye of the Midnight Sun's motto. HUNTER x HUNTER - Just how old is Komugi, anyways? Pretty sure my cursory knowledge of Japanese is telling me that "zetsubou" means "despair" and not "destroy". Oh hey, they're blending in with the mind-servants. "Human grapes" is a stupid name for those sacs. The tiny Poufs transporting the gungi stuff out reminds me of something out of Disney. On that note, did anyone else think the garage entrance to the basement looks a little like a table there? That's a proper noun I could've caught wind of earlier. I want that split-screen vision. Palm's personality post-Antification really is better than her initial. Meanwhile, more gay sex sounds. There's something about these nighttime mansion settings that get me all excited. Of everything I know and don't know about this arc, Pitou having a cell phone is probably the most surprising. Oh dang, a dungeon hallway, now it's getting even more exciting! Pouf with Komugi's face is just wrong. A better Butterfinger. A Betterfinger. Kimi no na wa... I don't think any of us should be surprised that he's dead, I mean we did see his severed head in Pitou's lap about 40 episodes ago. His pupils disappeared, that ain't good. And that's when the fourth stage of grief hits. ZETSUBOU. This banter's just here to break up the despair. You take a break for one minute and then this happens. The only good thing about Kite's death is that we no longer have to deal with Crazy Slots. Speaking of which, I think he'd have actually stood more of a chance against Pitou had his roll for a weapon not been a magical girl stick. And now he's relapsing back into the anger stage. It's both your guys' fault, let's leave it at that. Nevermind, now he's relapsing back into denial, he's going through this real bad. Whatever Palm's seeing, it's something that can't be explained with mere words. Or maybe it can. Someone please step on this nasty little man. NARUTO SHIPPUDEN - This episode exists to reaffirm the theory that Tenten is the most useless of the Konoha 11 (plus Sasuke).

AWWWWWWWW YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I hope Zeni gets arrested for public indecency, and then he'll be out of our hairs forever.

Fair.

Keep the politics in your pants, you people with sorta-careers.