Codename: Jackass

IT DOESN'T WORK LIKE THAT

YEAH BUT I LIKE MY SHIT CLEAN

SURE NO DIFFERENCE THERE

JACK OFF

GOD DAMN IT FUCK

The Rock is passionate, yet gentle. But he can be rough when necessary.

CAN YA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

I had a cat named Spot. She had a big white spot on her back. I am so creative.

Please describe this rock, now that we have established that it's cool.

Broken glass in rectum. Have rock drive you to ER.

Haha! lol! epic!

These maps are always bullshit, and I have never once seen or heard of anyone who eats chicken spaghetti for Thanksgiving.

hehe

They could give that food to me so I have more money to spend on booze.

I mean, I'm a fuckup, I don't make much money at my job.

Disease, liquor, killing all the buffalo, thanks Manifest Destiny!

This has been Condensed American History with empty.

It was originally just a harvest festival and feast, made into a federal holiday back during the Civil War as a day of "Thanksgiving and praise to our beneficent Father in the heavens", and now is just an excuse to stuff our faces and talk to family members we barely know and tolerate. There was also "The First Thanksgiving", which was the harvest feast that the first puritan settlers in the Americas had, where the Natives and the Pilgrims put aside their differences and helped each other out before the white man mercilessly slaughtered them for two centuries. It's kind of a sham, really, but it's a day off work and people get together and eat and supposedly enjoy each other's company. I just feel like as soon as Halloween is over, that's when the Christmas music and Christmas advertisements and Christmas shopping and Christmas Christmas Happy Holidays Happy Christmas Holidays Hanukkah Winter XMas Holiday Extravaganza starts and I get really tired of it by the time the day actually arrives, so I start as late as I can. Also those lights draw a lot of electricity and I'm not made of money.

I don't start putting up Christmas stuff until after Thanksgiving. Everyone else can rush the season but not me.

Terry Glenn was probably my favorite player on those mid-2000s Cowboys teams. Fuck man.

I'M NOT RETARDED, JUST STUPID.

THANKS ALCHEMIST I HONESTLY DIDN'T KNOW BBCODE WORKED OR I WOULD HAVE BEEN DOING THAT ALL ALONG.

NOW THAT WE'VE CONFIRMED I HAVE AN IQ OF 75, HERE YOU GO.

THAT'S IT?! WELL DAMN