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UnevenEdge

[classic swim]

SwimSuperstar
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Everything posted by [classic swim]

  1. [classic swim]
    His wife dropped a bowl of oven hot pizza rolls on his nuts when he was laying on the couch watching Magilla Gorilla. Because he let donkey track shit all over the house and he said “you smell like a damn donkey ass” to his wife.
  2. [classic swim]
    Sleeping on the couch because his wife didn’t want a donkey in the backyard and he hit her with the HEE HAW
  3. [classic swim]
    Brings wind up toy teeth to a city council meeting.
  4. [classic swim]
    His wife made him sleep on the couch because he said she was lookin like one of them bootycat dolls.
  5. [classic swim]
    Do not tease the animals.
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    Brought a polaroid of Col. Sanders over to the chicken coop and trained the hens to peck its eyes out.
  9. [classic swim]
    Went to a farm and did cow tipping while in a cow costume.
  10. [classic swim]
    Went to a farm and ate a Quarter Pounder in front of a cow.
  11. [classic swim]
    Put animal crackers in his soup.
  12. [classic swim]
    Kicked out of AMC for mixing the only 2 soda options they had.
  13. [classic swim]
    He made a Banjo sound when he discovered that it worked and that I could play!
  14. [classic swim]
    FullSizeRender.mov
  15. [classic swim]
    He likes to pretend nose cartilage means there’s a game inside his nose.
  16. [classic swim]
    Tried to sell an Atari at GameStop and walked out slamming it against the parking lot.
  17. [classic swim]
    Bums a light for his Candy cigarettes.
  18. [classic swim]
    Bought a queef jar from Fuggs.
  19. [classic swim]
    Made online betting out of Hungry Hungry Hippos.
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    He needed an outstanding loan and the popular CEO he knew said “Seiiiiiiiggggggghhht, here’s twenty million dollars!!”
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    Sure love having my eardrums assraped by Emergency Alert when I’m listening to Marvin Gaye. Like I can’t read the alert you sent in bold caps you gotta play the autistic fucking noise too.
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