fuggnificent

mmkay

sex makes you live longer...burns lots of calories too

put it to sleep. dogs murder!

get this one phillies https://www.labdoll.com/en/doll-realistic-sex-doll-63in-more/245-brooklyn-fat-love-doll-black-wm-160.html

Military hottie and i were arguing over something. not going into details but it involved another guy and i said his dick was bigger. anyway..military hottie was mad...i was mad...but i was horny..so i asked him to come over anyway. he came over obviously very angry and hed been drinking. he proceeded to hate fuck the shit outta me. at one point i had to stop him because i was abt to faint. we had a lot of awesome sex so thats just one story.

we need someone to accept submissions and remove all identifying info from them then send them anonymously to the judges

i want mthor to judge

im in

i didnt. he thought he was great. at one point i was squeezing my eyes tight clenching as hard as i could to derive some pleasure. he mistakenly thought it was because he felt so good. i did not invite him back.

He was like 4 inches and i could barely feel him. i should have known when he didnt enthusiastically send a dick pic like most guys. another guy,my boyfriend, couldnt fuck for more than 3 mins. we even timed him.

wow yall post the freakiest shit

more like assholephysics amiright?

wow hows this work?

its weird for me because ive always been thicc and self conscious abt my body and i barely knew him but we totally had a platonic serious shower together. his tub was kinda dirty, too. i cant remember how this all went down at all. if it was my idea or his and why we showered instead of me going home and doing it. i could ask him but i bet he doesnt remember lol

u should have one for phillies and one for work

yeah its nice if i get to it before my mom does

real mature, phillies wheres kudasai with the cattle prod?

i actually had to stop carrying cash. itd be months later and id pull 5s or 10s out of the back pocket of my jeans that id forgotten all about

lol i totally understand im braless right now. bras are so much work. it can wait til morning.

going to a sex date at a guys house and was thinking i didnt wanna come home then shower again (id shower before i left) cuz itd be obvious i did the deed. then i thought..well i could just shower @ his place...then a memory id totally forgotten flashed back of me showering @ madison's dad's place with him and me being grossed out that he didnt own any washclothes. ha! old memory banks arent totally blown!

ok he hates gourmet aquatic turtle food..loves dried shrimp..live slugs and cabbage. he bites hoodrat children. thanks,scoob.

so wut if it is? i can throw away all my pregnancy tests.

i knew it! im dying! please take care of zipper for me scoob! please!

like what?

i had 4 tenders, fries and a cookie.