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UnevenEdge

Pants' Pockets, Kinks, and Unicycle Pr0n


The_annoying_one

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5 minutes ago, The_annoying_one said:

And you win once again. 🤣

I should probably go to bed now. I’m REALLY tired.

Yaaaaaay...is my prize that horse we beat to death?🤣

Nighty night, sleep well...I almost called you Steve for some reason and I have absolutely no fucken idea why, think I'm tired too xD

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9 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

"They're touching me in.... places."

"Yeah, they get around."

lmao

That was the second thing I thought of when I suggested hand swapping, not the show but the premise...and then you made that reference and I knew we were both in good hands.

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4 minutes ago, hornedlizardman said:

I'm totally calling you Whiskers from now on. lol

Me here work'n it

11/28/19 • Cat GIF Website

 

 

Somehow I feel my porn name is related to my facepube comment on the absorbent mustache thread XD  I also feel like a catsuit would be written in my clause somewhere.

 

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1 minute ago, Vela said:

Me here work'n it

11/28/19 • Cat GIF Website

 

 

Somehow I feel my porn name is related to my facepube comment on the absorbent mustache thread XD  I also feel like a catsuit would be written in my clause somewhere.

 

Only if you cosplayed as Catwoman from Batman Returns. >_> lol

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1 minute ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

There's porn for every kink out there, right? 😝

Not so much for unicyclists...not that I've found at least. lmfao, there's a very uninteresting story behind what you're thinking to be true but is not.

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22 minutes ago, hornedlizardman said:

You'd be surprised at what I find interesting and vice versa.

 

19 minutes ago, Doom Metal Alchemist said:

I don't see how the story about finding out there's not much porn for unicyclists can possibly be uninteresting.

 

I'm not sure this is a General Discussion type of thing.  And I'm certain it isn't on topic, even though there could certainly be a kink for pant pockets.

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14 hours ago, hornedlizardman said:

You'd be surprised at what I find interesting and vice versa.

I'm revisiting this because I've had some sleep and just read what I wrote last night.  Now that I think about it the story is uninteresting because there's no story at all, I mean in my head there is but in actuality, no.

HOWEVER!  I shall embellish on my inquiry into unicycle porn and you shall see how uninteresting it was.

 

 

THE STORY BEGINS but a decade ago [or maybe more, who can remember] IN A LAND of unrealistic expectations and unclear evolutionary explanations KNOWN AS...Midstoden!  If you're in the Northern hemisphere. BUT TO THE REST OF THE WORLD IT IS CALLED...Thee Hub!  AND IT IS THERE that our misguided and skeptical protagonist starts her journey.

Itwentsomethinglikethis

Him:  Here. [adjusts laptop]  Think of something, anything.  It'll probably be here.

Me:  Okay.  Felting!

Him:  What?

Me:  You know.  Making things out of felt.

Him:  Okaaaay...yeah nothing on felting.  But...

Me:  K.  Then Unicycling!

Him:  Uh, there's bikes and...and I bet we could find clowns.

Me:  You said anything.  All I see is the same thing.

Him:  I think you're missing the...

Me:  Gumball machines?  Fish tanks.  Ascot.

Him:  [sigh]

Me:  Cumquat?  It's the perfect safeword!

Him:  Stop listing inanimate objects.

Me:  [silence]

...

...

...

Dinosaurs.  Why are you looking at me like that...

Him:  It astounds me how difficult you can be.  Even with something like this.

Me:  Okay fine.  ...Orthodontist.  ... ... I swear I'm not being difficult!  My first crush was on my orthodontist.

Him:  [sigh]  Fine. [hits enter]

Me:  Oh.  Whoa, no no.  Taking that back, just put in mud wrestling or something and end whatever [gestures] this is.  Actually...what is that...

Him:  This one?

Me:  Yeah that one there.

 

And so her journey continued.

 

 

But yeah, considering this was like over a decade ago it's quite possible the world may be over abundant in unicycle porn by now.  I really don't know!

Also THE END.

Edited by Vela
typo
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1 hour ago, Vela said:

I'm revisiting this because I've had some sleep and just read what I wrote last night.  Now that I think about it the story is uninteresting because there's no story at all, I mean in my head there is but in actuality, no.

HOWEVER!  I shall embellish on my inquiry into unicycle porn and you shall see how uninteresting it was.

 

 

THE STORY BEGINS but a decade ago [or maybe more, who can remember] IN A LAND of unrealistic expectations and unclear evolutionary explanations KNOWN AS...Midstoden!  If you're in the Northern hemisphere. BUT TO THE REST OF THE WORLD IT IS CALLED...Thee Hub!  AND IT IS THERE that our misguided and skeptical protagonist starts her journey.

Itwentsomethinglikethis

Him:  Here. [adjusts laptop]  Think of something, anything.  It'll probably be here.

Me:  Okay.  Felting!

Him:  What?

Me:  You know.  Making things out of felt.

Him:  Okaaaay...yeah nothing on felting.  But...

Me:  K.  Then Unicycling!

Him:  Uh, there's bikes and...and I bet we could find clowns.

Me:  You said anything.  All I see is the same thing.

Him:  I think you're missing the...

Me:  Gumball machines?  Fish tanks.  Ascot.

Him:  [sigh]

Me:  Cumquat?  It's the perfect safeword!

Him:  Stop listing inanimate objects.

Me:  [silence]

...

...

...

Dinosaurs.  Why are you looking at me like that...

Him:  It astounds me how difficult you can be.  Even with something like this.

Me:  Okay fine.  ...Orthodontist.  ... ... I swear I'm not being difficult!  My first crush was on my orthodontist.

Him:  [sigh]  Fine. [hits enter]

Me:  Oh.  Whoa, no no.  Taking that back, just put in mud wrestling or something and end whatever [gestures] this is.  Actually...what is that...

Him:  This one?

Me:  Yeah that on there.

 

And so her journey continued.

 

 

But yeah, considering this was like over a decade ago it's quite possible the world may be over abundant in unicycle porn by now.  I really don't know!

Also THE END.

I love you. 🤣

Anatomically-correct-heart.jpg

Edited by hornedlizardman
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9 minutes ago, The_annoying_one said:

Ok. Ok. I get it. This trainwreck is mine and mine alone! 🤣

Who said it was a trainwreck? It could be more like "the big one" at a race at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway, aka "the Brickyard" because the finish line is pretty much a strip of bricks...I think.

 

Edited by hornedlizardman
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3 minutes ago, Vela said:

In truth we came here because of you, and *points at your crotch* your pants.  I was pointing at your pants.

My pants? They’re just basic black sweatpants. >_>
 

3 minutes ago, hornedlizardman said:

Who said it was a trainwreck? It could be more like "the big one" at the Daytona 500.

Which also contains quite a few wrecks…😂

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2 minutes ago, The_annoying_one said:

My random observation for today:

I’m finally starting to realize that the only people I should trust in my life are family and a very few close friends/acquaintances. And you know what? That’s okay. The less people I have to deal with, the better.

That is a very wise observation.

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5 minutes ago, The_annoying_one said:

And it makes only took me….almost 40 years to come to it! 😆

It's sad that we can't be more trusting.  Makes you feel like it's you against the rest of the world.  I don't want to be at odds with over 7.8 billion people knowing that it only takes one of them to ruin everything.  Sorry...that came out a little pessimistic xD On the flip side it makes it all the more special when you find someone you can trust in.  :RoboIndifferent: must protect. 

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10 minutes ago, Vela said:

It's sad that we can't be more trusting.  Makes you feel like it's you against the rest of the world.  I don't want to be at odds with over 7.8 billion people knowing that it only takes one of them to ruin everything.  Sorry...that came out a little pessimistic xD On the flip side it makes it all the more special when you find someone you can trust in.  :RoboIndifferent: must protect. 

Oh, trust me, I completely understand. I’m feeling VERY pessimistic lately. And once again, you are 1000% right. One or two really close friends is a lot better than a bunch of assholes who really don’t give a crap about you either way. How’s that for pessimism? 😛

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30 minutes ago, Vela said:

It's sad that we can't be more trusting.  Makes you feel like it's you against the rest of the world.  I don't want to be at odds with over 7.8 billion people knowing that it only takes one of them to ruin everything.  Sorry...that came out a little pessimistic xD On the flip side it makes it all the more special when you find someone you can trust in.  :RoboIndifferent: must protect. 

Tell me about it, bestie. It can be hard to trust family at times, too, especially those who are supposed to have your best interests at heart.

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