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When's the last time you heard about a midlife crisis?


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lmao, it's all crisis now.



- "Yes, son, the mid life crisis went the way of the polar bear."

- "The polar what?"

- "Polar bear. It's a big hairy beast from the frozen north."

- "Frozen what?"

- "Omg, every time with you. This is why I only do the mandatory once a month visitation. I didn't even want kids. Stupid aliens and their stupid breeding programs. I can't believe I bought into their campaign promises. "Do what we say and we won't kill you," fucking bullshit. I die a thousand deaths every time I have one of these conversations, I tell ya."


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Alieums: "This guy isn't even trying to raise that kid, and he's blaming the kid for his negligence..."

Alieums #2: "Yes. His fear of being seen as a failure conflicts with his desire to not do jack shit"

Alieums: "We made a mistake."

Alieums #2: "Yes."

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