That_One_Guy

Im not talking about doing household stuff. I'm talking about like if I'm going 85 in a 70 and she starts telling me what to slow down like it's an order. I had an ex do that. We lasted 3 weeks

Nah you leave the seat up

Damn right I'll go to that weather center like a mother fucker

You get a lot of practice typing one handed?

Well get to it bro. Why you still here?

Is when I'm in a relationship and my significant other tries to tell me what to do. I never try to tell anyone I'm with what they should do. If they ask my opinion or for advice, I'm happy to give it. But I feel like your boyfriend /girlfriend should never try to tell you what to do like you're their child. I have issues with authority as it is, but if I have a girlfriend that thinks she can control me or some shit Ill go back to being single and beating my dick in a hot second.

Cause you eat ass.

Homies back and ass looks like an upside down cawk

Hank Hill irl

I imagine this is what Robin Williams' ass looked like.

You'll find one eventually. Take your time

Meant to write meh. Fucking autocorrect

So you're like me?

Your ass looks like Micky Rourke

Ty bro

What about a dry paper bag?

Like the beginning of a bad porno

It sounds like you have a lisp.

Where you at bro I'm about to be at your head like a shower cap

I only got powerful shells that pack an explosive blow!

I'll load these shells down your throat no red lobster

When you see me walking around like a pirate with a wooden leg just know it's because I have a long ass barrel in my captain underpants

I'm going to unload like a pick up truck. So you better not fold like laundry!

The only thing hot is the barrel on my biscuit

I'll fuck around and POP you