"you know mr customer...i just want to take time out to thank you for maintaining your composure because really..when im getting cussed out and abused...that really makes me want to do what im supposed to do even more. and you know..yelling at me is totally productive because altho i have zero responsibility over what transpired to cause your extreme temperment today - i represent the COMPANY and so you should totally abuse me because ill go back to the company with your complaints and theyll totally change every little messed up thing they do just because little old me said so. so again, THANKS!"