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UnevenEdge

When Things Go PICHUUN: Another Blatch Review Special


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Posted

It all started about a month ago, when I was looking for new Binding of Isaac mods to download. I stumbled upon one that changed Dark Esau's sprites to that of Koishi Komeiji, a character I liked very much a good number of years ago, because I saw a bit of myself in her, but also because she's cute as a button. So I downloaded it, and before I knew it I was looking up fan art of hers on Danbooru. This rekindled my love for a franchise that basically served as my introduction to deep weeb-ery, back on 2014 when I was a sophomore in high school and didn't know better. Tumblr played a big role in it, as I ended up following a few people who blogged about the series, and one of them made weird images and videos like this that probably played a role in my brain becoming increasingly broken and prone to laughing at avant-garde shitposts over the years. Now, I was only deeply invested for a few games as they came out, but I found myself coming back to the series every so often, if only for the fan works. It just wasn't until recently that it blossomed into a full-on obsession, and right as I was about to take my love for iDOLM@STER to the next level by watching the IRL lives starring the seiyuus. So much for that crap.

So what am I talking about, anyway? Oh yeah... the Touhou Project. Or as it's called in America, old hat.

Now, how can I make this involve content ratings? There's no official Touhou anime, but there is a lot of fanime in varying levels of quality. But once you sift through all the Flash-animated IOSYS music videos, recreations of the openings to various anime, and... yes, even Cookie, there are only two major series with episodes long enough to potentially air on TV: Musou Kakyou: A Summer Day's Dream, and Fantasy Kaleidoscope ~The Memories of Phantasm~ (since everything's got to have two titles). Guess I'll start there. In an alternate universe, one of these showed up on Toonami for April Fools', maybe replacing Mind Game on that one night where they aired subbed content. But since our timeline is too lame for something like that to ever happen, coming soon, you will be seeing my thoughts about this franchise rendered in the only way I know how: snark, starting with the first episode of A Summer Day's Dream, since it has an original story and professional voice actresses. If it was good enough for Squid Girl, then it should be more than enough for this plucky indie franchise.

And by the way: I've actually played the games (the ones from the Embodiment of Scarlet Devil to Phantasmagoria of Flower View, anyway). So while anyone can claim they like the franchise based on consuming anything (like porn), I figure I'll throw in a show of confidence.

  • Like 1
  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

So I've found that I'm not nearly as anxious when pushing out big posts as I've been lately, and I think that's a good sign. Anyway, here we go...

Touhou Musou Kakyou: A Summer Day's Dream
Episode 1: "A Summer Day's Dream"

(natch)

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[spoiler: it's capitalism, apparently]

Posted

Finally, I now know what a Touhou is. Took me well over a decade to get to this point, honestly. To think it all began with a Mac/PC parody video that quickly turned into my first JoJo reference...

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  • 2 weeks later...
Posted
  On 5/12/2022 at 10:28 AM, PokeNirvash said:

Finally, I now know what a Touhou is. Took me well over a decade to get to this point, honestly. To think it all began with a Mac/PC parody video that quickly turned into my first JoJo reference...

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That video was published in 2007? Man... sometimes I forget that Touhou has been around this long. I subconsciously assume it didn't get really big until my heydey in the fandom began, which was back in 2014-15. It coincided with various games for the franchise, including the official ones, becoming legally available in America. Oh, and Suika showed up on Keith Olbermann's ESPN show. That's when you know you've made it.

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Okay, time for the next.

Touhou Musou Kakyou: A Summer Day's Dream
Episode 2: "Pre Established Harmony"

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The next episode in this series is 2.5, which is half the usual length. I could smoosh it and Episode 3 into a single post, but that's as far as the English subs for this series go. (Fortunately, there is an Episode 4, and it came out late last year.) I'd rather try to draw things out for your reading pleasure, and besides, these posts tend to be long enough as they are.

  • 3 weeks later...
Posted

Touhou Musou Kakyou: A Summer Day's Dream
Episode 2.5

[where's the title?]

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So anyway, two more episodes to go, but only one is subbed. And... wait a minute, hold the phone. I just got off of it with the CEO of anime, and she told me there's another Touhou series out there. And this one's made by the Chinese! They're not really people you should deal with (just ask Phil Mickelson), but I am privvy to watching just about every damn Touhou fanime ever made, so I'll take a bite out of this apple. The show is called Hifuu Club Acitivity Record ~ The Sealed Estoeric History, and it takes a decidedly different approach compared to other series by portraying the elaborate backstories of all the characters in Gensokyo, some of which is made up, but the main focus is on two nutjob humans from the outside world who tell us all about it. Sounds like fun, don't you think? So this is now schedule for after I finish this series. Yeah, I'm itching to get to Memories of Phantasm, but it's the longest of the various fanime by a big margin, and I want to go in it without any distractions, save newly subbed episodes of any series that come out.

Posted
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Posted

A few replies:

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Posted

Touhou Musou Kakyou: A Summer Day's Dream
Episode 3: "Unraveling Déjà Vu"

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I'm glad the show pulled this one out like Seiran out of a hat, because after two and a half episodes where the main draw was... well, the fact that it exists, I'm glad it's taken on a unique flavor: slice of life with an unsettling cerebral edge. On to Episode 4!

But wait a minute, didn't I say earlier it wasn't subbed yet? Turns out it is, and has been since I started this project. I just wasn't looking hard enough. 🙃

  • 3 weeks later...
Posted (edited)

Touhou Musou Kakyou: A Summer Day's Dream
Episode 4: "The Beginning of Summer"
[title not appearing in the episode; neither did Episode 3's]

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On to Hifuu Club.

Edited by Blatch
Bottom text was in black, because I took it out of the spoiler.
  • 1 month later...
Posted

And today marks 20 years since the Embodiment of Scarlet Devil ("the" is part of the title) came out... in Japan. But I'm not waiting until tomorrow my time to celebrate.

Touhou Hifuu Club ~The Sealed Esoteric History~
Episode 1: "Moon"

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  • 2 months later...
Posted (edited)

Touhou Hifuu Club ~The Sealed Esoteric History~
Episode 2: "Wish"

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Edited by Blatch
Very minor edits: removing an extra blank space and a weird OCD-tinged wording change. And then I fixed the text.
Posted
  On 10/25/2022 at 9:18 PM, PokeNirvash said:

You may also wanna color your spoiler text black, that way I can actually read it. ;)

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Oh wow, thanks for catching that. It's weird for me to not do it, even considering that I'm often caught up in fine-tuning certain parts of my posts and might miss some big errors.

  • 2 months later...
Posted

Touhou Project Side Story: Memory of Stars

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And I do believe we are at the end of the year. Hope you had a good 2022; I felt like I got better as the world got worse. See you all for Touhou 19, let alone all of this fanime.

Posted (edited)
  On 1/1/2023 at 4:32 AM, Blatch said:

Hope you had a good 2022; I felt like I got better as the world got worse.

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I know I did, to the point where I thought the world was overreacting.

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Edited by PokeNirvash
  • Thanks 1
Posted
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Touhou Hifuu Club ~The Sealed Esoteric History~
Episode 3 [part one]: "Wish"

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And that does it for this one for a while. I'd rather not explain myself, but I think you know what's next.

Posted (edited)
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Edited by PokeNirvash
  • Like 1
Posted (edited)
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Edited by Blatch
Minor edits. I originally posted this on mobile and had to remove extra lines, but then I fine-tuned other parts.
  • Like 1
  • 4 months later...
Posted (edited)

It's now been more than a year since I started this project... and more than a month since I first wrote this post, which itself came a month after I saw the episode. Sorry for the delays, but now it's finally ready: the final piece of the puzzle.

Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episode 1: "The Spring Snow Incident"
a.k.a. "The Ordinary Magician or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Kotarsu [sic]"

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Edited by Blatch
Spacing issue. Glad I'm getting *this* in before midnight too.
  • 3 months later...
Posted

 Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episode 2: "The Scarlet Mist Incident"
[part one] a.k.a. "Interview Without the Vampire"

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  • 1 month later...
Posted

New avatar just dropped. I feel like Kogasa and Eiki are tied for my favorite by now.

 Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episode 3: "The Scarlet Mist Incident"
[part two] a.k.a. "Interview Without the Vampire"

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Posted

And we repeat.

 

 Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episode 4: "The Scarlet Mist Incident"
[part three] a.k.a. "Interview Without the Vampire"

 

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  • 3 weeks later...
Posted

Need another treat for Halloween? Did your kids not get any full-size candy bars this year? I've got you covered, though I wasn't intending to do it this way.

Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episodes 5 and 6: "The Flower Incident" a.k.a. "Judgment Day"

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Posted
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  • Like 1
  • 4 weeks later...
Posted

Happy Giving Tuesday. By contractual obligation, I have to give something to you, if only because I didn't over the Thanksgiving holiday. It's gonna be really good.

Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episode 7: "Legend of the Giant Youkai" a.k.a. "Daidarabocchi, King of the Monsters!"

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[stiiiiiill waiting... for another CG review]

Posted (edited)

Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episode 8: "The Eternal Night Incident" [part one]
a.k.a. "The Night the Earth Stood Still"

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Edited by Blatch
Edited the icebreaker. The original intro was from an earlier version of the post.
  • 2 weeks later...
Posted (edited)

Two weeks? Sounds good. Would be nice if I can keep this schedule, though weekly posts would be even better.

Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episodes 9 and 10: "The Eternal Night Incident" [part two and ending: part one]
a.k.a. "The Night the Earth Stood Still"

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Edited by Blatch
Further redid the title to match the series' official description of Episode 10. Previously, I deleted a space after it.
  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

So I wanted to finish the current arc of Memories of Phantasm before the end of the year, but then I realized that, for the second year in a row, I could cover a weird one-off Touhou fanime as little a treat. So here it is:

『Touhou Flash Animation』Highly Responsive to Prayers

 

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[keep on exterminatin' in 2024]

  • 1 month later...
Posted (edited)

Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episode 11: "The Eternal Night Incident" [ending: part two] a.k.a. "The Night the Earth Stood Still"
and Episodes 12 and 13: "The Courage Test Incident" a.k.a. "The Only NEET Thing to Do"

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Edited by Blatch
Added something I want to get at to the random section, plus I... might've fixed the embed, assuming it needed it.
  • 2 months later...
Posted (edited)

Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episodes 14 and 15: "The Youkai Mountain Battle Incident" [parts one and two] a.k.a. "The Battle of Youkai Mountain", heh

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[ten thousand creatures, none the same]

Edited by Blatch
As advertised.
  • 3 months later...
Posted

Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episodes 16 and 17: "The Youkai Mountain Battle Incident" [ending: parts one and two] a.k.a. "The Battle of Youkai Mountain"

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  • 1 month later...
Posted

And so we've finally reached the end of this long, strange famine trip... for now.

Touhou Fantasy Kaleidoscope: The Memories of Phantasm
Episode 18: "The Reimu Assassination Plot"
a.k.a. "Reimu Only Lives Twice"

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[at least the zoloft is working]

  • 2 months later...
Posted (edited)

Touhou Hifuu Club ~The Sealed Esoteric History~
Rewatch discussion

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Edited by Blatch
(Initial:) Oh right, coloring the second half of the title. Pssh.

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