Zenigundam

I'll join the Marines later. I wanted to start out with the OG Army Infantry because I'll be there in the trenches on Day 1 and I could give us an early lead in the war.

There's nothing sexier than a legal age teen who has an extensive collection of fluffy pajamas that she wears to bed. #WardrobeWarriors #YesAllWomen

I did join the military and my women have their priorities straight, such as getting homework done and paying attention in class.

Dude, the military is not garbage. Now pick up that flag that you just threw! 😐

Today was cold and bitter, but I powered through and dominated all of our training obstacles. The drill dude got in my face because I apparently have to "lose" some of my stomach muscle and I told him that he has to lose his virginity and not to be jealous because I'm packing more firepower than he is. Went to the mess hall and ate some manly grown man alpha male military grub, and then I went back to the barracks or whatever they're called and decided to do some video game training, so of course I hooked up games like Fortnite, Metal Slug, and Urban Strike. I love being a soldier. It's so cool, gonna go sneak in a case or Milwaukee's Best Ice later on and invite some OKC biddies over to the barracks for a cool party. 👨‍✈️

I like to have fun sex, not offensive sex. You watch too much TV

I don't want any cops getting hurt is all. We need them to protect us. Yes, I was called to join the military after being recruited for my Fortnite abilities, it was a moment of magical destiny, but I can't protect America and our freedom by myself. 🧔

Nah cause they're only max ten years older than I am and they think they know it all plus theyre jealous of younger women. 🤦‍♂️

Came in the mail, but my mom forgot to tell me! Go Zenigundam Go!!! 🐺👫💪🤳

Legal age, dude. Legal. I don't like to break the law. 👮‍♂️

How can I ever get over them? 😌 *succumbs to the giggle chills*

Nah, THIS guy is creepy.

*pushes you back a little* Come on, man, don't do that. You're getting too close... *muscles tighten* 🐰

I'm just a kid, my room is supposed to be messy, messy means you've been doing fun things

Hot girls, especially those in the legal age range of 16-18 in New Jersey, love men who can get work done with their hands. This is a display of alpha male strength. 🦒

It's all part of the plan...

I was chosen for this mission!! I'm built for this!! This is the real life Hollow Knight!! 👨‍✈️🐺👨‍👩‍👧‍👦

Jealous because I'm doing what you only read about in comics or are you just an eccentric insect rights activist? Jelly jelly ielly... I'm a warrior! 🤺

Just a small part of the carnage 👊🦒🦋

My walls are lined with blood from killing them. I like the new decor.

They must love malt liquor. I'm beating the crap out of them.

I get the female newcomers. You just need more game... and muscle... and alpha male moves...

Oh I always thought that was a reference to when I went on the ESPN comment section for the "Blake Griffin slaps somebody outside of a nightclub story" and commented about how I wish he would try that on me because he would get KTFO, and then it ended up being the most replied to comment on the story with everybody going nuts and calling me a keyboard warrior and saying how he would shove the MBI can that I was resting my chin on up my ass in my FB profile pic then.

Popuko and Pipimi or however you spell their names are so sexy