Vodkajellyshot Posted November 30, 2017 Share Posted November 30, 2017 (edited) Hello! Is this Gordon's Pizza? No sir - it's Google Pizza. I must have dialled a wrong number. Sorry. No Sir - Google bought Gordon's Pizza last month. OK. May I order a pizza please. Do you want your usual, sir? My usual - do you know me? According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called, you ordered an extra-large pizza with three cheeses - sausage - pepperoni - mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust. OK - that's what I want . May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta - arugula - sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat, gluten free, thin crust? What? I detest vegetables. Your cholesterol is not good, sir. How the hell do you know? Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records. We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years. Okay, but I do not want your rotten vegetable pizza! I already take medication for my cholesterol. Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly. According to our database, you only purchased a box of 30 cholesterol tablets once, at Chemist Warehouse, 4 months ago. I bought more from another Chemist. That doesn't show on your credit card statement. I paid in cash. But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement. I have other sources of cash. That doesn't show on your last tax return unless you bought them using an undeclared income source, which is against the law. WHAT THE HELL? ! I'm sorry, sir, we use such information only with the sole intention of helping you. Enough! I'm sick to death of Google - Facebook - Twitter - WhatsApp and all the others! I'm going to an island without internet - cable TV - where there is no mobile phone service, and no one to watch me, or spy on me !! I understand sir - but you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago! Edited November 30, 2017 by Vodkajellyshot 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death_by_motorboat Posted November 30, 2017 Share Posted November 30, 2017 haha tell 'em to delete your account Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rilkean_heart Posted November 30, 2017 Share Posted November 30, 2017 I thought this would be about MST3K Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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