1938_Packard

I wonder if you'll still be vested once they figure out you've been stealing from the lost and found.

Except that nothing was ever stolen.  As long as I follow the prescribed procedures and get a valid property removal form, it's all good with management.

You can....You have no friends, no women, nowhere to go, reek of trash and smoke and kitty litter......Dandruff would just complete the image that you are satisfied with being a failure.

Failure?  Have you even started working on a pension yet?  I'm fully vested in three of them right now, so even without Social Security, I'm worth more money retired than working.  Better start now.  You don't wanna be fifty three years old with seven years ahead of you before vesting, chump.

Weebtrashfuckwit

Would you prefer something from Charles Gounod?

They won't scare any crows, but they forget your drink and ignore you when you try to get their attention.

What do guys like to do at this hour? I'm chilling watching Forensic Files and eating a very late dinner lol.

I'm just waiting for one of my favorite cartoon shows to come on.  I'll watch that and go bed.

Song plays while I sit at the computer.  "Bad Dog, No Biscuit" from the Seatbelts.  That's real music.  Music for coffee guzzlers.

Matches that don't have a smell I'll assume.

Matches are sulfur.  You'll smell plenty of that.  It kind of reminds me of the Paint Pots in Yellowstone. 

B E P I S

In Cowboy Bebop Universe, it's Pippu.  Did you ever notice that or don't you ever still frame your anime?

The seeds are a super fiber food, like Celery.  It's like Roto Rooter for your colon.  Got a tough clog?  No match for sunflower seeds.  Just burn five books of matches when you're finally empty.

Why are you even mentioning that shit? A connoiseur with a rattail should only be using Garnier Fructis.

Dandruff shampoo at least twice a month can prevent dandruff.  You can't have your shoulders in need of a snow shovel.

and this is not my beautiful wife

 

 

same as it ever was

I found myself... in a shotgun shack.  And, I found myself... in another part of the world.  And, I found myself... behind the wheel of somebody else' automobile.  Then, I ask myself... How old is this can of Pepsi?  It doesn't even have a pull tab.  I gotta clean out my fridge more often.  Same as it ever was.

The container is blue.  The product looks like broccoli baby food.  And, it smells like a Halls tablet.

Assuming Hell exists.

 

Which it doesn't.

 

::]::

You're one of THOSE?  I see... Eventually, you're going to float away from all this, thinking, "Man... it all seemed so real..."  Some people could call it Heaven, Hell or even Hotel California but I subscribe to the alternate universe idea.  Just an infinite number of probable landing spots for a soul that hasn't gotten a third of this one figured out yet.

zi'm talking about your sould dipshit......I hope it forever tethered to trash.

I'm worth more money retired than working, according to some of the statements I've been receiving.

I hate to break it to you packard, your body is just gonna get thrown in the trash.

Then the medical students won't have anything to examine when researching the effects that a lifetime of chain smoking can cause.  Yeah... put these lungs on the deli slicer for a good set of cross sections.

Way more personality than dogs.

I hope is bound to a broom closet.....Or better yet, a dumpster.

The corpse isn't all that important anyway.  Why do you think some people burn them?  Preserving it like a vintage car is pointless.

A paupers grave in the Pine Barrens isn't a different universe.

When I'm dead, my corpse is going to be sliced up and passed around among medical students for study.  My soul will be someplace else entirely.

no it doesn't.

I'm pretty sure the people in Hell get more than their share of back aches and other pains.

If you killed yourself you wouldn't need a chiropractor.

Depends on which universe I end up in after that.

So he talks dirty on the phone......What's bed phone manners?

Stupid auto fill.

It is playing on the radio as I type this. I NEED A DANCING SMILEY

Your avatar looks like he's pouring a drink while dancing the Macarena.

Three weeks ago, I gave my chiropractor some forms I needed for work.  He politely filled them in and I faxed them to the right department.  Three days later, the department sent the forms back to me, asking for clarification on some of the answers the chiropractor gave.  I gave the forms back to the chiropractor and he decided to call the department directly.  You should have heard him... calling the department agent all sorts of a "micro-ditz", "stupid" and other choice words.  I guess I'm going to hear something from my department manager at my next shift, but there isn't much that can be done when I wasn't the offensive speaker.

What did they expect?  They were selling the worst quality shoes in the Western hemisphere.  Come on, now... bakelite heels?  You couldn't find any leather in those stores... all vinyl.  Sure, you could get a pair of shoes for $15 in there, but what good was that when they started falling apart in five or six days?

Model SB-PS70.  Exceptional bass for their size.