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orthodontics


Raptorpat

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so I'm probably between 3-4 months into a stint with invisalign retainers. never had braces as a kid because my teeth weren't that bad, but 25 extra years of the bottom teeth being crowded messed everything up and my teeth were grinding themselves down and my bite was out of alignment. sooooooooooo enter the amazing world of adult orthodontics.

fancy 3D-printed retainers, move onto a tighter set every 12 days. every four retainers, gotta go in for a check-up and the dentist has to do 'reductions' on my bottom teeth (literally grinding the sides ughs) to make room while they shift around. one of the selling points is you can eat or drink anything as long as you take them out first, but really you need to brush and floss before you put them back in so nothing is trapped in there to fester. i haven't had an enamel-dissolving soda since august, which is probably for the better, and I can't really snack (or it's not really worth the cleaning effort at least). I have flossed more in the past 100 days than the rest of my life combined. as much as you eventually get used to the plastic retainers in your mouth, you'll suddenly have moments of hyper awareness over it. when mealtimes sneak up, my mouth will literally start rejecting them sometimes like how i imagine the sensation of a body rejecting a prosthetic.

but eventually I'll supposedly have wonderful teeth, paid for by the COVID-19 student loan freeze.

anyways, who wants to share and bond over orthodontics stories, the greatest thing to bond over?

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52 minutes ago, Raptorpat said:

this post brought to you in part by: procrastinating dinner for four hours because I am warded off by the extra steps to clean the retainer first and then my mouth after

you’re not the only one that’s hurting here, Pat. The economy stinks, bees are dying, movies are pretty much all sequels now and I have a broken penis.

 

Don’t pretend to know my pain......

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10 hours ago, molarbear said:

you’re not the only one that’s hurting here, Pat. The economy stinks, bees are dying, movies are pretty much all sequels now and I have a broken penis.

 

Don’t pretend to know my pain......

In most instances of broken, or fractured penis, the Tunica Albuginea has been torn. If you are experiencing this then I would highly advise that you seek medical attention, as surgery will be required.  

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12 hours ago, molarbear said:

you’re not the only one that’s hurting here, Pat. The economy stinks, bees are dying, movies are pretty much all sequels now and I have a broken penis.

 

Don’t pretend to know my pain......

Every ten minutes I'm going between laugh and cry reacts, just because I legit do not know what to think about a broken penis.

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2 hours ago, PenguinBoss said:

I know it's boring, but I didn't have anything interesting happen when I had braces. I didn't even eat any rubber bands that I'm aware of.

I do, however, have somewhat frequent dreams about still having them, specifically about the rubber bands for some reason.

I use to use my pencil to shoot my rubber bands across the room during movies

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14 hours ago, scoobdog said:

You broke your penis in 1998?

....It was 6th grade

"Now that's what I call music" had just dropped was had just dropped

The Will-enium was approaching but none of us were aware that in 5 years ASMB would start

 

cd's.jpg

Edited by molarbear
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ORTHODONTICAL non-broken-penis UPDATE

I had a check-in appointment and a regular cleaning appointment mushed together yesterday.

I made a comment about not being sure I really needed the cleaning appointment having been in every month and a half since August and the brushing/flossing 3+ times a day. She explained why the cleaning is still important and that she would be doing it herself because they are down dental hygienists "because nO oNe WaNtS tO wOrK aNyMoRe" and I'm like thinking a little "that's kinda TMI but also eww."

Then when everything was done and I was practically in my coat and out the door she was like "oh wait sit back down I still have to grind a gap in between two bottom teeth" and then after the surprise grinding she almost sent me away with retainer sets 12-15 instead of 9-12 but fortunately ol' eagle eyes Malone over here was paying attention.

 

ok that was my orthodontical update

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I 100% believe that dentists run up costs where they can. During covid dentists tacked on a ppe fee until the state AG put out a notice reminding them all that they can't charge

But the 6mo cleaning/check-up was covered by insurance, I don't pay anything out of pocket for that. I actually had two separate appointments, I scheduled the cleaning before I started the Invisalign so I had two appointments I asked to consolidate because coming in twice was dumb.

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10 hours ago, Raptorpat said:

ORTHODONTICAL non-broken-penis UPDATE

I had a check-in appointment and a regular cleaning appointment mushed together yesterday.

I made a comment about not being sure I really needed the cleaning appointment having been in every month and a half since August and the brushing/flossing 3+ times a day. She explained why the cleaning is still important and that she would be doing it herself because they are down dental hygienists "because nO oNe WaNtS tO wOrK aNyMoRe" and I'm like thinking a little "that's kinda TMI but also eww."

Then when everything was done and I was practically in my coat and out the door she was like "oh wait sit back down I still have to grind a gap in between two bottom teeth" and then after the surprise grinding she almost sent me away with retainer sets 12-15 instead of 9-12 but fortunately ol' eagle eyes Malone over here was paying attention.

 

ok that was my orthodontical update

 

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  • 2 months later...

ORTHODONTICAL UPDATE

I'm like a week out from the final of 15 retainers, then after that they have to rescan for the final refinements, and after that's all done I wear a retainer for another six months and then I'm a free man. aside from the night retainer i'm supposed to wear until i die.

BUT ANYWAYS i just reached out to a friend who's also doing it and he said they had to stop and start over on a whole new set of 26 retainers and that's just wow all my sympathy

ok so that's the orthodontical update

 

but really I assume everyone's checking this thread now to see how @molarbear's broken penis is doing

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2 hours ago, Raptorpat said:

ORTHODONTICAL UPDATE

I'm like a week out from the final of 15 retainers, then after that they have to rescan for the final refinements, and after that's all done I wear a retainer for another six months and then I'm a free man. aside from the night retainer i'm supposed to wear until i die.

BUT ANYWAYS i just reached out to a friend who's also doing it and he said they had to stop and start over on a whole new set of 26 retainers and that's just wow all my sympathy

ok so that's the orthodontical update

 

but really I assume everyone's checking this thread now to see how @molarbear's broken penis is doing

Glad your teef are straight and correct but will @molarbear's broken penis ever be corrected? Will he be labeled a Bill Clinton supporter for life? Will this up his street cred? Will he be quadrupling his body count?

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3 minutes ago, crackymckrackin said:

Glad your teef are straight and correct but will @molarbear's broken penis ever be corrected? Will he be labeled a Bill Clinton supporter for life? Will this up his street cred? Will he be quadrupling his body count?

“All this and more on the next all-new episode of “Unsolved Mysteries”.

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9 hours ago, crackymckrackin said:

Glad your teef are straight and correct but will @molarbear's broken penis ever be corrected? Will he be labeled a Bill Clinton supporter for life? Will this up his street cred? Will he be quadrupling his body count?

It still looks like a curly fry from arby's

Dude got the nation out of debt and got head while doing it

prob not

also ^

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  • 3 weeks later...

ORTHODONTICAL UPDATE

I had my "final" appointment this morning where I got the cement nubs grinded off my teeth and they do a new scan to determine if any further refinements are needed.

I don't know why I couldn't handle it this time, but I 100% had a mini panic attacks while she was grinding/polishing and had to stop a couple times and at one point went "WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO PUT MY TONGUE" and they were like "just relax and breathe through your nose and the tongue will know what to do (spoiler alert: it didn't). I can still feel slightly residue that she'll have to polish off next time but my mouth isn't full of pokey cement nubs so yay I guess.

Then the assistant took me into the other room for the 3D scan and I said "don't worry I won't freak out, there are no sharp moving parts" but then she babied me through the entire thing (think like lots of "ok I'm going to move it right here and there will be a little bit of pressure" and lots of "great job!") and it was frankly a little embarrassing even though no one else was there. Like it's just a square plastic wand.

Then as the scan compiled she was like "it'll be just a minute ok? There's an emergency we have to take care of and then we'll be right back. So I have no idea if I was allowed to, but I started zooming in and playing with the scans on the touch screen monitor for the ten minutes I was alone and then when the dentist came back I was able to make a more compelling argument that I will need additional refinements for my front-most teeth because she didn't believe me earlier and she said ok.

SO THE STORY CONTINUES 

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I probably need to get some kind of thing to straighten my teeth. I refuse to wear braces. What's crazy is I still have a root from a baby tooth that never fell out in my gum because it's tangled up with the roots attached to one of my permanent teeth, and it can't be removed unless I have surgery. I also have a couple wisdom teeth that need to get pulled, and one is in a virtually impossible spot. Yay me?

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Pat, you and Ktackva are special people. If I were you, I'd get a grill fashioned out of platinum and walk around like the G-unit kinda guy you are. Don't let the label of masticatory disablement get any of those good vibes you're putting out. Heck

I'm actually thinking as far as your jawline is concerned, you might be just what they want when atypical psych meds become normalcy. I mean, the poop factory always wins, but you don't have to sit and chew the cud that they're giving out like hay. Literally. Peace out brother.

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On 2/16/2023 at 3:19 PM, Raptorpat said:

ORTHODONTICAL UPDATE

I had my "final" appointment this morning where I got the cement nubs grinded off my teeth and they do a new scan to determine if any further refinements are needed.

I don't know why I couldn't handle it this time, but I 100% had a mini panic attacks while she was grinding/polishing and had to stop a couple times and at one point went "WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO PUT MY TONGUE" and they were like "just relax and breathe through your nose and the tongue will know what to do (spoiler alert: it didn't). I can still feel slightly residue that she'll have to polish off next time but my mouth isn't full of pokey cement nubs so yay I guess.

Then the assistant took me into the other room for the 3D scan and I said "don't worry I won't freak out, there are no sharp moving parts" but then she babied me through the entire thing (think like lots of "ok I'm going to move it right here and there will be a little bit of pressure" and lots of "great job!") and it was frankly a little embarrassing even though no one else was there. Like it's just a square plastic wand.

Then as the scan compiled she was like "it'll be just a minute ok? There's an emergency we have to take care of and then we'll be right back. So I have no idea if I was allowed to, but I started zooming in and playing with the scans on the touch screen monitor for the ten minutes I was alone and then when the dentist came back I was able to make a more compelling argument that I will need additional refinements for my front-most teeth because she didn't believe me earlier and she said ok.

SO THE STORY CONTINUES 

Did you at any point of your visit wonder about @molarbear broken penis or how it might get corrected?

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  • 3 months later...

I got bamboozled yesterday

I thought the appointment was to get my cement attachments taken off but it was just the regular x-ray and cleaning

the silver lining is that I found out after going to this place for a decade+ that they have a kid-sized version of the x-ray rectangle they shove in your mouth, and I'm 100% asking for that every time I get an x-ray for the rest of my dental days

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2 hours ago, Raptorpat said:

I got bamboozled yesterday

I thought the appointment was to get my cement attachments taken off but it was just the regular x-ray and cleaning

the silver lining is that I found out after going to this place for a decade+ that they have a kid-sized version of the x-ray rectangle they shove in your mouth, and I'm 100% asking for that every time I get an x-ray for the rest of my dental days

Penis is still broken

 

 

 

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