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That_One_Guy

UEMB Writing Competition Volume II [SUBMISSIONS CLOSED]

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Alright! Fuck it! Let's go for it!

Welcome to the second volume of the one and only UEMB writing competition!

It's been like two years since we've done one of these, and seeing as how a lot of the drama has died down, I figured what better time to bring back the writing competition. 

FIRST ORDER OF BUSINESS: I will need four judges. I myself will simply host/encourage/announce the results.  If you would like to judge the writing of your peers, pm me! Please don't ask to judge if you have an overly busy life. The last thing I want is add to anyone's daily stress. Only do it if you will enjoy it. K, betch?

SECONDLY: This years deadline will be much shorter. As in January 24th. This will give participants time but not too much time. Last year everyone was done in like two days and by the time I announced the results some people and forgotten about it. SO YE HAVE ONLY TWO WEEEEEKS!

THIRDLY: This year there will be a prompt, an element you must include in your story, and a line of dialogue you must also include. You will be judged on how seamlessly you implement said variables. 

THE RULES:

As I believe in complete freedom of speech and expression, there aren't many rules. But the one's I have are as follows:

1. Do not put your real name or username anywhere in your story. I will be the only person that knows who submitted the stories. This keeps the judging free of bias

2. There is a 2,000 word limit. Your story can be as short as you want but it cannot exceed this limit. Doing so is an automatic DQ. Obviously you can go a smidge over. Just don't be an asshole

3. All three variables MUST be included in your story. Not including them is an automatic DQ.

5. One entry per person

6. Enjoy whatever you create and have fun. Your story can be written in any genre or style so long as it complies with the guidelines set. Yes, this is a corny rule. If you have a problem with that I'll drink your blood.

That's really it for the rules. Now let's move on to what you must include in your story:

PROMPT: A drug deal gone wrong

Element: A threesome (this doesn't necessarily have to be sexual in nature)

Line: "Wow, did you really just do that?"

AND THAT'S IT! We have a writing competition now! Once you've finished, email your stories to [email protected] Make sure you tell me your username in the email. I will then pass it on to the judges.

It should be noted that there is no prize at this moment as we never really figured that part out. If any of you have any suggestions, I'm open.

Speaking of winners, big shout out to the winner of the first UEMB Writing Competition: @Kweerie!

NOW GO CREATE! And remember, I still need judges lol

Edited by That_One_Guy
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Wasn't... Damn I forgot the name, I'm bad with names. Oh @Kweerie.... I guess she isn't around to host it though? I should probably be able to judge if needed. Also 2000 words isn't steep so I'll make a submission if I'm not needed as a judge this time. Either way it'll be fun!

 

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3 minutes ago, PhilosipherStoned said:

Wasn't... Damn I forgot the name, I'm bad with names. Oh @Kweerie.... I guess she isn't around to host it though? I should probably be able to judge if needed. Also 2000 words isn't steep so I'll make a submission if I'm not needed as a judge this time. Either way it'll be fun!

 

If you wanna be a judge hit me up! If not, that's also fine.

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I mean I remember last time it seemed like we didn't get that many involved. It turned out great still that's why I said I'll judge if needed. Depends on how many others want to judge... It's been a while since I wrote a short story so I'm still trying to decide. I've wrote plenty though.. 

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5 minutes ago, SwimModSponges said:

I promise I won't be dramatic this time.

Still ashamed of how I acted.

Lol you're fine bro. I don't remember you acting crazy at all

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I'd say the whole "writing an analysis of my own story longer than the story itself because nobody appreciated it" thing was in bad form.

But I've already started my entry and oh god it's happening again.

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59 minutes ago, SwimModSponges said:

I'd say the whole "writing an analysis of my own story longer than the story itself because nobody appreciated it" thing was in bad form.

But I've already started my entry and oh god it's happening again.

Just relax man. You're beating yourself. 

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Thank you for starting this back up again 🎶

Tbh I'm a little bummed about the mandatory variables so I'll likely sit this out and look forward to reading the entries.

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Just now, avec said:

Thank you for starting this back up again 🎶

Tbh I'm a little bummed about the mandatory variables so I'll likely sit this out and look forward to reading the entries.

Funny thing is a lot of people complained about there not being enough guidelines last time lol

But this should be a good one. I'm happy when we do shit besides hate each other 🤣

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9 minutes ago, That_One_Guy said:

Funny thing is a lot of people complained about there not being enough guidelines last time lol

But this should be a good one. I'm happy when we do shit besides hate each other 🤣

I hear you, just not into writing about drugs or ever including dialogue 🤷🏽‍♀️

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Just now, avec said:

I hear you, just not into writing about drugs or ever including dialogue 🤷🏽‍♀️

Yeah maybe I picked a shitty prompt but hey next time someone who can think gooder can host it lol

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2 hours ago, SwimModSponges said:

I'd say the whole "writing an analysis of my own story longer than the story itself because nobody appreciated it" thing was in bad form.

But I've already started my entry and oh god it's happening again.

It was a great story, but yes that was bad form. 🤣🤣

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58 minutes ago, That_One_Guy said:

Yeah maybe I picked a shitty prompt but hey next time someone who can think gooder can host it lol

Meh.. It's an edgy prompt, but I still think there's a lot of room for creativity in it. 

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10 minutes ago, Admin_Raptorpat said:

Was there a prize last time? I can do a custom rank to the winner.

Last time Kweerie won it and she already had a custom rank so we were like uhhhh..... Lol I mean if the winner doesn't have a custom rank that could be the prize

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I may or may not have just sent an abridged version of the script from the movie Surf Ninjas. 

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Hey, can I judge again? I promise to behave and not be snarky if somebody refers to 40 degrees as "frigid" again.

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I’m going to submit an entry once again. Not to much of a fan of the prompt, but I’m partway done with a story that doesn’t involve The Fast & The Furious fanfiction. 

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6 hours ago, PhilosipherStoned said:

Is the plan to email submissions to you and use the same hosting site as last time?

Yup

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The only disappointing thing about the rules this year is that the word limit is still 2,000. Oh well, I can cook something up involving the prompt and elements given.

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2 hours ago, PokeNirvash said:

The only disappointing thing about the rules this year is that the word limit is still 2,000. Oh well, I can cook something up involving the prompt and elements given.

I can't wait to see what you write! 

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15 hours ago, That_One_Guy said:

Yo still need two judges

Don't make me be lazy again guys.. I was just now looking at the calender and deadline. I'll judge if need be. 

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2 hours ago, SwimModSponges said:

Hey im having trouble emailing word documents right now is there a mandatory format we gotta send?

nope. you can literally just copy and paste it in an email

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4 hours ago, SwimModSponges said:

sounds good will do.

P.S. I'm aiming for last place again :P

Over my dead prose you're getting last place! 

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4 hours ago, That_One_Guy said:

nope. you can literally just copy and paste it in an email

So it looks like sending the word document worked this time as long as you're able to open it.

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10 hours ago, SwimModSponges said:

sounds good will do.

P.S. I'm aiming for last place again :P

Did you really get last place last time? I voted impartially, but your submission probably did stick out enough all the judges were like...Sponges again.

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10 hours ago, Admin_Raptorpat said:

did you post a link in FFA? i can lock/float it if you do

Nah I didn't. Think I should?

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My scores will be in sometime on Monday I guess. I had plenty of time to finish reading the submissions during the week I just got side tracked.. Now I have to wake up, and drive about 50 miles to be somewhere by 6am.. I just got back from doing the same thing today.. How are the other judges doing lol?

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2 hours ago, PhilosipherStoned said:

My scores will be in sometime on Monday I guess. I had plenty of time to finish reading the submissions during the week I just got side tracked.. Now I have to wake up, and drive about 50 miles to be somewhere by 6am.. I just got back from doing the same thing today.. How are the other judges doing lol?

I have sent my scores in today.  And let me tell you, there WILL be a reckoning. 

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