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Age of S'jet

I've been emoitionally detached for years

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I had a break last night. Cried, and cried hard for the first time in years. There's been tears here and there over the last 7 years - but barely any.

I know I'm not exactly everyone's favorite on here, but I'm pretty lost right now and I don't know what to do anymore.

It's like everything I've repressed has came out and I don't know what to do.

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9 minutes ago, The_Hound said:

I had a break last night. Cried, and cried hard for the first time in years. There's been tears here and there over the last 7 years - but barely any.

I know I'm not exactly everyone's favorite on here, but I'm pretty lost right now and I don't know what to do anymore.

It's like everything I've repressed has came out and I don't know what to do.

uhh, maybe see a therapist or something? like a real one. idk we're not exactly the best people for real mental breaks

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5 minutes ago, Naraku4656 said:

uhh, maybe see a therapist or something? like a real one. idk we're not exactly the best people for real mental breaks

I have always found them impersonal and fruitless on the basis they're only there for your money.

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21 minutes ago, The_Hound said:

I had a break last night. Cried, and cried hard for the first time in years. There's been tears here and there over the last 7 years - but barely any.

I know I'm not exactly everyone's favorite on here, but I'm pretty lost right now and I don't know what to do anymore.

It's like everything I've repressed has came out and I don't know what to do.

((hugs)) I’ve been there many times.  If you need someone to listen I will not judge you.  

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30 minutes ago, The_Hound said:

I had a break last night. Cried, and cried hard for the first time in years. There's been tears here and there over the last 7 years - but barely any.

I know I'm not exactly everyone's favorite on here, but I'm pretty lost right now and I don't know what to do anymore.

It's like everything I've repressed has came out and I don't know what to do.

Yah u repress and deny a lot. But it felt good to get out huh

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14 minutes ago, The_Hound said:

I have always found them impersonal and fruitless on the basis they're only there for your money.

Maybe becuz u weren't really facing and expressing your issues. Try again. Journaling helps (theres something going on with journals cuz u have find them fairly cheap everywhere with all these designs n shit...o wate...girly designs mostly...i think Family Dollar has some plain ones...or try amazon)

I cant wait for the next stage of your emotional development 😁

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1 hour ago, The_Hound said:

I had a break last night. Cried, and cried hard for the first time in years. There's been tears here and there over the last 7 years - but barely any.

I know I'm not exactly everyone's favorite on here, but I'm pretty lost right now and I don't know what to do anymore.

It's like everything I've repressed has came out and I don't know what to do.

Get real life friends...

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7 minutes ago, Still Me said:

Get real life friends...

Prove u have some first before u run yo mouth hoooooooo

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9 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

Prove u have some first before u run yo mouth hoooooooo

I don’t have to prove myself to anyone...I don’t live my life in the fucking boards like you do...now stop breathing my air you pathetic sack of shit

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3 minutes ago, Still Me said:

I don’t have to prove myself to anyone...I don’t live my life in the fucking boards like you do...now stop breathing my air you pathetic sack of shit

I dont see how posting even one pic with evidence of one friend is revealing too much when most people have done it. What exactly are you REALLY trying to hide no freend asssssss

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Sometimes you need a moment where, once it's done, you felt like you tore the head off of a cow.

Usually it's something that had been a constant drag for years and you finally dealt with it. It's a mistake to handle things that way, though sometimes you don't have much of a choice.

Alternatives can be hobbies. But your regular everyday hobby won't work. It's a normal thing for you. An example is my bar... depression built it, but doing so helped me feel better and clear my mind. Carpentry is far from a regular hobby for me... so you need to grab an irregular hobby.

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18 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

Prove u have some first before u run yo mouth hoooooooo

Hol up... as much of your own life you share and we never see any pics of friends. So.....?

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1 minute ago, fuggstop said:

I dont see how posting even one pic with evidence of one friend is revealing too much when most people have done it. What exactly are you REALLY trying to hide no freend asssssss

Why do you need to know anything about my fucking personal life? Oh wait...you don’t...

i don’t have to justify myself to you...I’m not you...I don’t crave the fucking attention...it’s not your fucking business who I talk to or what I do with them.

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1 hour ago, The_Hound said:

I had a break last night. Cried, and cried hard for the first time in years. There's been tears here and there over the last 7 years - but barely any.

I know I'm not exactly everyone's favorite on here, but I'm pretty lost right now and I don't know what to do anymore.

It's like everything I've repressed has came out and I don't know what to do.

Sorry, bruv....not really well versed in the facing of life's problems

Good luck though

 

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Just now, 𝙍𝙤𝙜𝙪𝙚𝘼𝙡𝙥𝙝𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙚 said:

Hol up... as much of your own life you share and we never see any pics of friends. So.....?

My phone auto deleted a bunch n i dont feel like digging but i got more

20190304_200752.jpg

20190304_213140.jpg

full (16).jpg

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3 minutes ago, Mix said:

Sorry, bruv....not really well versed in the facing of life's problems

Good luck though

 

I jus sayin u get some friend too before u order TheHound around mean ass biihhh

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7 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

I dont see how posting even one pic with evidence of one friend is revealing too much when most people have done it. What exactly are you REALLY trying to hide no freend asssssss

 

2 minutes ago, Still Me said:

Why do you need to know anything about my fucking personal life? Oh wait...you don’t...

i don’t have to justify myself to you...I’m not you...I don’t crave the fucking attention...it’s not your fucking business who I talk to or what I do with them.

 

I knew this couple who would intentionally have fights in public all the time, then go home and have furious make up sex....

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2 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

I jus sayin u get some friend too before u order TheHound around mean ass biihhh

you're just on autopilot at this point, huh

fun stuff

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34 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

Prove u have some first before u run yo mouth hoooooooo

Well, this is the dumbest shit I read today.

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14 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

My phone auto deleted a bunch n i dont feel like digging but i got more

So you have three and one pic that is definitely old... or your phone camera is just that shitty.

 

Either way. This is not your thread, so keep your stank to yourself.

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1 minute ago, 𝙍𝙤𝙜𝙪𝙚𝘼𝙡𝙥𝙝𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙚 said:

So you have three and one pic that is definitely old... or your phone camera is just that shitty.

 

Either way. This is not your thread, so keep your stank to yourself.

Dont ask bout me in annutha person thread den

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38 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

Prove u have some first before u run yo mouth hoooooooo

While she didn't really need to make that post (considering everyone here knows i go out all the time with friends), i think ignoring her post is better for you. I reported her the other day for using my images without permission so she's on thin ice. Anyway - I repressed things because I never wanted to burden people with how I was feeling, burying things seems a lot easier at first but it catches up to you.

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1 minute ago, The_Hound said:

This'll really piss people off

Sorry for being mean to you fuggz, honestly you've never been a dick to me.

Its ok....its the atmosphere 

But i believe deep down u r not a bad guy and i say it a lot..u prolly dont see it...but u remind me a lot of the young fugg

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22 minutes ago, 𝙍𝙤𝙜𝙪𝙚𝘼𝙡𝙥𝙝𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙚 said:

Sometimes you need a moment where, once it's done, you felt like you tore the head off of a cow.

Usually it's something that had been a constant drag for years and you finally dealt with it. It's a mistake to handle things that way, though sometimes you don't have much of a choice.

Alternatives can be hobbies. But your regular everyday hobby won't work. It's a normal thing for you. An example is my bar... depression built it, but doing so helped me feel better and clear my mind. Carpentry is far from a regular hobby for me... so you need to grab an irregular hobby.

I'm sorry to you too ben.

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19 minutes ago, fuggstop said:

My phone auto deleted a bunch n i dont feel like digging but i got more

20190304_200752.jpg

20190304_213140.jpg

full (16).jpg

You don't have to prove anything to anyone. Don't do this stuff, it just makes things worse.

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Just now, fuggstop said:

Dont ask bout me in annutha person thread den

Again, I call it how I see it... I let you know, as close to your face as I could (thankfully it's MILES away) how wrong/ much of an asshole/ gross/ whatever. You realize (again I am saying this), the bullshit you catch is because of the bullshit you say. You put a bad vibe on people, they retaliate. Get used to it, or clean up yourself.

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1 minute ago, The_Hound said:

 

 

While she didn't really need to make that post (considering everyone here knows i go out all the time with friends), i think ignoring her post is better for you. I reported her the other day for using my images without permission so she's on thin ice. Anyway - I repressed things because I never wanted to burden people with how I was feeling, burying things seems a lot easier at first but it catches up to you.

Yah i do it and it will not only catch up to you but it will block your..blessings? Basically can block u from reaching the next level and get what u deserve in life. I hope u move on a better, stronger man. Nothing better than a guy in touch with whats going on emotionally. Trust that!

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1 minute ago, 𝙍𝙤𝙜𝙪𝙚𝘼𝙡𝙥𝙝𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙚 said:

Again, I call it how I see it... I let you know, as close to your face as I could (thankfully it's MILES away) how wrong/ much of an asshole/ gross/ whatever. You realize (again I am saying this), the bullshit you catch is because of the bullshit you say. You put a bad vibe on people, they retaliate. Get used to it, or clean up yourself.

Wuh

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3 minutes ago, The_Hound said:

You don't have to prove anything to anyone. Don't do this stuff, it just makes things worse.

Its fun tho

I be like O RLY??? Haaa

Sorry its in this thread. Maybe rogue can delete it?

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Lol.

 

Viper trying to upset people by being nice to fuggs but no one cares what viper does.

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I have suicidal thoughts on a weekly basis but they're fleeting and my brain quickly meets them with "Not worth it, life is interesting'.  Depression for me has it's roots in my life from youth to about 19 being very unintentionally introverted. I am an extrovert by heart, and over the last few years with heavily socialization I figured having friends and plans every weekend would heal that hole - it just repressed it and in turn when I would be met by even the slighest hardship, I'd take it out on people around me, justifying what i say due to my ego that I'm always right and no one elses opinion matters. I realized I'm wrong and I don't have to hold everything in myself, people closest to you do listen and usually want to - thats what friends are.

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1 minute ago, stilgar said:

Lol.

 

Viper trying to upset people by being nice to fuggs but no one cares what viper does.

mhm no

just being honest. and judging by some of the replies in this thread it does look like people do.

i know you wouldn't care either way if im dead or alive, but that's fine.

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8 minutes ago, The_Hound said:

I have suicidal thoughts on a weekly basis but they're fleeting and my brain quickly meets them with "Not worth it, life is interesting'.  Depression for me has it's roots in my life from youth to about 19 being very unintentionally introverted. I am an extrovert by heart, and over the last few years with heavily socialization I figured having friends and plans every weekend would heal that hole - it just repressed it and in turn when I would be met by even the slighest hardship, I'd take it out on people around me, justifying what i say due to my ego that I'm always right and no one elses opinion matters. I realized I'm wrong and I don't have to hold everything in myself, people closest to you do listen and usually want to - thats what friends are.

Going from extrovert to introvert is what i did a few years back....I still have the charisma, but other people and things distract me from my goals.  Wasn't a problem when I was living for myself, but with the kids i have to maintain focus....Other people and their bullshit just gets in the way.....It's why I deal with my lady friend and a couple of smoke buddies just to keep from being a total recluse.

The people I allow around me also desire their personal space and we get along because of that.  I don't know what's going on with you right now, and really it's none of my business but there is nothing wrong with being an introvert is it's allowing you to maintain peace of mind.....Now if it's causeing depression, then that's another bag of worms that you have to find the source of, but introvercy isn't inherently bad.

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5 minutes ago, cyberbully said:

Going from extrovert to introvert is what i did a few years back....I still have the charisma, but other people and things distract me from my goals.  Wasn't a problem when I was living for myself, but with the kids i have to maintain focus....Other people and their bullshit just gets in the way.....It's why I deal with my lady friend and a couple of smoke buddies just to keep from being a total recluse.

The people I allow around me also desire their personal space and we get along because of that.  I don't know what's going on with you right now, and really it's none of my business but there is nothing wrong with being an introvert is it's allowing you to maintain peace of mind.....Now if it's causeing depression, then that's another bag of worms that you have to find the source of, but introvercy isn't inherently bad.

the girl ive been with was in a heavily abusive relationship before me. rape, physical and mental abuse, etc. she told me i deserve better and she really isn't ready yet. it's what pushed me to the edge. I had thought my heart dried up a long time ago and this pushed me to the edge. i gave everything and it still wasn't enough, i tried so hard to make her happy and treat her right and there was nothing i could do. i cried for her and her past abuse first and then a surge came and everything went from her to me in my head, and i couldn't stop. everything i've repressed came out, I guess i have her to thank. I've been capable of loving other people but never myself until 3 nights ago when this happened.

so.. that's what's been going on.

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5 minutes ago, The_Hound said:

the girl ive been with was in a heavily abusive relationship before me. rape, physical and mental abuse, etc. she told me i deserve better and she really isn't ready yet. it's what pushed me to the edge. I had thought my heart dried up a long time ago and this pushed me to the edge. i gave everything and it still wasn't enough, i tried so hard to make her happy and treat her right and there was nothing i could do. i cried for her and her past abuse first and then a surge came and everything went from her to me in my head, and i couldn't stop. everything i've repressed came out, I guess i have her to thank. I've been capable of loving other people but never myself until 3 nights ago when this happened.

so.. that's what's been going on.

Eh.....Well, I'm not here to psych eval but it sounds like you may have some codependency issues....Like you attached yourself to her and her problems and in that time you found a part of yourself you kept bottled up.  

I only say this because it was a trend i had to break....I would constantly gravitate to broken people, and try to "fix" their problems or be the person they could lean on....All while ignoring my inner struggles because it's easier to be there and help other than it is to dig deep to find what it is you're missing...But all that aside, basically I just decided to focus on me and my happiness....It's not selfish to make yourself a priority.

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1 minute ago, cyberbully said:

Eh.....Well, I'm not here to psych eval but it sounds like you may have some codependency issues....Like you attached yourself to her and her problems and in that time you found a part of yourself you kept bottled up.  

I only say this because it was a trend i had to break....I would constantly gravitate to broken people, and try to "fix" their problems or be the person they could lean on....All while ignoring my inner struggles because it's easier to be there and help other than it is to dig deep to find what it is you're missing...But all that aside, basically I just decided to focus on me and my happiness....It's not selfish to make yourself a priority.

I definitely do this. Like this is me to a tee. I've always been generous with food, money and advice to all of my friends - never really spend time worrying about myself. I definitely flock to broken people. But.... I mean look at this shit show of a world we live in, I think we're all a little broken...

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the internet nowadays is a black hole dude. 

i do agree that therapists are really impersonal, but if you have your friends/connections, seek them out more seriously if you can.

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5 hours ago, The_Hound said:

 

 

While she didn't really need to make that post (considering everyone here knows i go out all the time with friends), i think ignoring her post is better for you. I reported her the other day for using my images without permission so she's on thin ice. Anyway - I repressed things because I never wanted to burden people with how I was feeling, burying things seems a lot easier at first but it catches up to you.

No I’m actually not on “thin ice”

the images are public and therefore within my domaine...

never even got a warning

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6 hours ago, The_Hound said:

 

 

While she didn't really need to make that post (considering everyone here knows i go out all the time with friends), i think ignoring her post is better for you. I reported her the other day for using my images without permission so she's on thin ice. Anyway - I repressed things because I never wanted to burden people with how I was feeling, burying things seems a lot easier at first but it catches up to you.

 

So .... there's a lot going on in this thread and in no way am I qualified to give you advice but it sounds like you just finally had a catharsis. I understand feeling like you don't want to burden your friends with how you're feeling but that is what real friends are for. Your friends care about you and would be willing to atleast listen and let you vent even if they can't offer any real advice. I think this concentration of emotion you experienced is perfectly normal and human. You should trust someone to talk to your feelings about even if its not a therapist. Break ups are hard for everybody and just from what I read it seems like your ex should probably get some professional help if she hasn't already because unresolved trauma will tend to snowball and lead to escapist tendencies. Everybody has trauma, you just have to choose how you're going to deal with it. Work on accepting that you are worthy of love and understanding. 

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17 hours ago, fuggstop said:

Its ok....its the atmosphere 

But i believe deep down u r not a bad guy and i say it a lot..u prolly dont see it...but u remind me a lot of the young fugg

Same.  I have nothing against you either Fuggs.  I don’t dislike you at all.  In fact, I don’t really dislike anyone here on the boards except for one or two people and I just don’t interact with them.  

We should stop tearing each other down and show some support for @The_Hound.  It takes balls to post about your feelings.  Sometimes we need to drop the asshole persona and show just a little human empathy.

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